November 12, 2016
Hello again fellow consumer of toys most elegant! In years previously past, Blog Fellow of the Moist and Tepid has presented selections designed to elevate and fun. This is true even now in common era. Applaud and delight as Editor Staff present anew the badly translated of toys foreign and odd.
Item First of Honor- Here we display item of possible edible quality. Souperman!
This sent to place by listener commentator Mac of BIOnight, Go to website here for music and wonder! https://macofbionight.bandcamp.com/ We appreciate sending of picture for thanks or blame!
Item Second of Next- More Superman! Superman Fly for Truth! Superman use Saddle of Justice! Superman Ride Horse of Know What For?
Superheroic Man ride horse of night color! Lasso and steed! New!
Item Third After Next- Superhero make you totem of respect when given to children for present or tolerate!
It possibly good toy!
Item Fourth Not The Last- More super power, maybe for ladies or use of funtime at night.
Ladies pleasure of excitement! Head attach!
Item Five of Awesome Gods- Spader-Man selection of five battle for right and against for justice minus evil. Bendable!
Spader-Man Red and Blue! Spader-Man Red! Spader-Man Blue! Color of toy to stimulate and pretend! From the new! Bonus!
Item Last in List- From movies of budget with people to be seen.
Franstromers Franstrom from robot to other robot! Sell for two dollars in one dollar store!
For other selections maybe enjoy other link here to see more and know: Foreign Knock-Off Toys Part 1
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Mr. Blog's Tepid Ride 
Allan Keyes: Back In Black… and brown
19 NovNovember 19, 2016
Ladies and Gentlemen, my apologies. Once again, I present Allan Keyes. (I’m out of here.)
From the Department of Don’t Blame Me:
Hey, I’m back!
Now I know, after reading that sentence, several questions come to mind:
-Where ya been?
-Who are you again?
-How quickly till you go away?
Well, I USED to post quasi-regularly here, when Mr. B would whine enough to get me off my ever-fattening ass. I USED to be someone. And now, what I am is “Daddy.” And that’s why I’ve been absent from posting. Because when you have multiple infants who feel that sleep is optional, throwing up some content for a blog – even the lazy, thoughtless stuff I churn out – may as well be trying to learn quantum physics. TIRED. Those 3am diapers won’t change themselves.
AND SPEAKING OF DIAPERS…… the other day, Baby Girl Keyes (NOTE: Not her real name) was dressed very fashionably in an outfit that featured pants covered with all of the Disney princesses.
Awww…
She was her usual self, racing around as fast as her hands and feet could carry her, yelling like a lunatic (LIKE FATHER LIKE DAUGHTER!) when she went very calm and still. Which is never a good sign with her. So, being the good father I am, I called for Wife Keyes (NOTE: Her real name) to come check her. And when that didn’t work, I paused 90-Day Fiancee (and we will talk about that show in a future post) and went to check on the kid.
Well now…turns out the kid took one of those diaper-bursting monster dumps that went all the way up her back and down her legs. But as I help her up to run her to the changing table (read: cardboard box covered in newspapers) the only thing I could really notice was all the faces of those Disney princesses were slowly turning brown.
Ewww…
It was hilarious – all these princesses starting to look like Archie Bunker in blackface putting on a minstrel show. (All in the Family season 6 episodes 14 and 15, Birth of The Baby parts 1 and 2. What, you thought I made that up?)
NOTE: These images are, of course, ridiculous, and if anyone is offended, just remember that this is Archie Bunker and if anyone was not a role model and didn’t deserve to emulated, it was him.
Plus, this is a post about baby poop and stains. Don’t look for political or racial discourse here.
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Tags: All in the Family, Allan Keyes, Archie Bunker, black face, blackface, Blackface Bunker, bmj2k, Disney, don't blame Mr. Blog, Fat Guy, fat guy eating cheeseburger, fatherhood, fun with teh internets, gratuitous Kardashian tag, meme, minstrel show, Mr. Blog, Mr. Blog's Tepid Ride, Mr. BTR, no sleep, parenting, poop, princesses, racist, send all comments to Allan Keyes, sitcom, so wrong, sorry, white face, whiteface, wrong