Archive | people RSS feed for this section

Should I Be Worried About Alec Baldwin?

8 Nov

November 8, 2021

Poor Alec Baldwin. He’s “inconsolable,” he’s “hysterical,” he’s so distraught that he and his family have recently been seen house hunting and drinking expensive latte in Vermont coffee houses. His wife has been so miserable that she has been posting happy family portraits on Instagram of Alec and the kids playing in the snow.

Poor Alec! He must feel so terrible since he, you remember, recklessly killed a woman in cold blood.

Poor poor man! On that movie set, he was handed a gun, and all he did was check to see if it was loaded, no I mean handle it safely with his finger off the trigger, no that’s not right, he aimed a gun at a human being and pulled the trigger. Yeah, I think that’s what I mean.

Oh, sad Alec! I know how horrible this made you feel, and I know how upsetting this must be, and yes, this is all very traumatic for you.

Of course, there’s a dead woman whose family won’t be spending the holidays with her, but hey! Buck up, buddy!

When did Alec Baldwin become a victim and not a victimizer? He’s a Producer on that film. He is one of the people responsible for the overall safety on that set. The buck stops with him. And of course, he carelessly, recklessly, and very, very stupidly aimed the gun at another human being and pulled the trigger. On top of not checking to see if it was loaded. He broke every rule of gun safety and common sense.

But cheer up, pal! The media is rallying around you, Alec! They are printing stories of how this has affected you, of how you are never going to be the same. They are rooting for you, Alec old boy!

Hey, that dead woman will never be the same either, but don’t despair, Alec! Everyone loves you Alec Baldwin!

You goddam asshole.

Should I be worried about Alec Baldwin? Only if he has a gun in his hand.

.

.

American Chopper- Pimpin’ for The Man

4 Sep

September 4, 2021

Mr. Blog is not a paid attorney spokesman, but Paul Teutul Sr. Is.

I used to do recaps of American Chopper every week, eventually live-blogging it as it aired. It’s a part of this blog that I’d rather forget. I am sure that watching that show killed more brain cells than if I had a motorcycle accident. But if I did have a motorcycle accident, I’m sure Paul Teutul Sr.- non-lawyer paid spokesperson – could recommend one.

Or three.

Or five.

How many lawyers does Paul Sr. shill for?

All the lawyers!

Behold the withering glower of Paul Teutul Sr.!

Those are not all the firms I found. I could have gone on and on. They shuffled lawyers in and out of the studio to stand next to the fading physique of Paul Sr., stopping just long enough for Sr. to stand and glower and (probably) call his son “numb nuts” a few times while the cameras filmed a few seconds to make it look like Sr. had some clue of the names of the people next to him.

This says less about Paul Sr. than it does for the lawyers, all of whose firms are not independent at all but part of a legal referral network that sends your case to a local law firm depending on your location.

Paul Sr. has likely not spent more than ten minutes with any of those people. That’s OK, after watching season after season of American Chopper, I can guess that Sr. had a massage appointment to get to.

%d bloggers like this: