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Top Ten Pumpkin Spiciest TV Characters

8 Oct

October  8, 2017

It is autumn and that means that it is Pumpkin Spice Season. Everything comes in pumpkin spice flavor. Coffee, bread, steak, arsenic, it’s all pumpkin spice! So in the spirit of the season, the Editors and Staff of Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride (Home of the Almost OK Blog) have gotten together a list of TV’s most beloved and iconic characters and rated them on our patented Pumpkin Spice Scale.

We’ve scoured your favorite sitcoms and dramas and picked out your all-time favorite and beloved TV stars. We then took the best of the best and ranked them from least to most pumpkin spiciness. Did your favorite hero make the list? Is the small screen’s greatest villain in the top ten? Let’s find out!

 

WOLF BLITZER: 1/2 PUMPKIN SPICE

 

PHYLLIS VANCE: 1 PUMPKIN SPICE

 

BARNEY RUBBLE: 1 1/2 PUMPKIN SPICE

 

THE SNORKS: 2 PUMPKIN SPICE

 

TAYLOR SWIFT: 3 PUMPKIN SPICE

 

CAPTAIN KIRK: 3 1/2 PUMPKIN SPICE

 

OLIVIA BENSON: 4 PUMPKIN SPICE

 

PRESIDENT NIXON: 4 1/2 PUMPKIN SPICE

 

FRED MERTZ: 5 PUMPKIN SPICE

 

EDGAR ALLAN POE: 6 PUMPKIN SPICE

 

Did we leave out any of your favorite TV stars? We hope we listed all of your favorite television characters. If we missed any, please leave a comment below and tell us who you think are the most pumpkin spicy TV stars!

 

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The Chinese French Fry Theory

26 Aug

August 26, 2017

This theory, like many others, began with my Dad but it was quickly adopted by me and for years I lived by its simple precept: 

Never buy food from a Chinese restaurant that serves French fries

It makes sense. It really does. 

  • If someone goes to a Chinese restaurant and orders French fries, it stands to reason that they are not big fans of Chinese food.
  • If enough people go to a Chinese restaurant and order French fries that the restaurant puts it on the menu, it stands to reason that most of their customers do not know much about Chinese food.
  • If most of a Chinese restaurant’s customers would rather order French fries than fried rice, it stands to reason that the restaurant has no incentive to cook really good Chinese food.

So in other words, French fries on a Chinese menu are an indication that the Chinese food isn’t too good. 

Ditto with chicken wings. 

Chicken wings with French fries is NOT a Chinese dish!

 

 

 

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