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Imponderable #136: Pooper!

23 Oct

October 23, 2017

Let’s say you’re out for your regular morning jog. You’re a healthy person. You exercise and eat right. You take vitamins and keep a healthy daily routine. But those beans you ate the night before aren’t sitting right. Maybe they were under cooked. Maybe the sauce was past its expiration date. Too bad you are so far from home. Good thing you brought your toilet paper with you.

Or maybe you’re just a disgusting human being.

Click to enlarge and read my hilarious commentary

Yup, a woman in Denver has been serially pooping on people’s lawns. Like a dog would. Except that a dog’s owner would clean it up.

This isn’t a one-time thing. This isn’t someone who had an unforeseen gastrointestinal episode. This is a crappy human being (pun intended) who plans this as part of her routine. She brings toilet paper with her. And the biggest sign this is intentional? She ignores the nearby public restrooms. 

I realize that public toilets are often cesspools but there are some parts of the world where people take toilets very seriously.

Why would anyone in their right minds intentionally drop their drawers and publicly poop on other people’s property?
The question is Imponderable. Even for Sherlock Holmes.

 

 

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Coming Soon… ish… ly…

20 Sep

September 20, 2017

Hello fans. The Editors and Staff of Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride want all of you to know that unlike all that mail from the IRS, your letters and emails have been read and we are prepared to answer them right now. (Audit schmaudit. Let the IRS go after me. This blog is run by a shell corporation located in the Lesser Antilles.) 

We’ve got some interesting, er funny, um whatever stuff coming up soon.

We’ll catch up with yours truly Mr. Blog and discover the sad aftermath of my hiatus from Facebook. I was offline for a month and when I came back it didn’t go well. Who expected to get into an argument over whether the Earth is flat on my first night back?

Meanwhile, if you live in Colorado Springs, watch out! There’s a mad bomber on  the loose.

No, not that guy. More like this:

Plus, we’ll kick off the Halloween season with the latest salvo between Count Dracula and his arch-nemesis, Gwyneth Paltrow.

All this and, I hope, some other stuff, coming to you eventually from Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride at bmj2k.com.

 

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