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ALL NEW! Sneak Peek for May 2017!

12 May

May 12, 2017

 

Hello Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride subscribers and those of you who ended up here after a failed google search. Here are some of the stories I optimistically plan for this month. 

First up is a story of religion, popcorn, and what happens when you combine the two. Yes, this really happened to me. (Kinda sorta.)

Next, another story that happened to me. All I did was get into the elevator in my building. I may have gotten on at the fourth floor, but I got off at the Twilight Zone Home for Senior Citizens.

Finally, this is the one headline that I did not make up, and this story THANK GOD did not happen to me.

Yup, that’s from Zimbabwe. You may remember my trilogy about the panty-stealing Zimbabwe goblins. This promises to be just as believable. 

All this and who knows what else, this month at bmj2k.com. 

 

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Do Not Give This To Your Children (Give This To Your Children)

14 Mar

March 14, 2017

Watching TV is like watching all the worst in life. No, I haven’t been watching American Chopper reruns, I’m talking about commercials. In particular, I’m talking about commercials for medicine. They are so full of disclaimers and legal jargon that I’m not sure if I should ask my doctor or lawyer if I should take something. But if I’m diagnosing myself based on symptoms recited by a talking pink pill, I may have other problems besides an upset stomach. 

I was watching TV when an ad for Linzess came on. As far as made up medicine names go, Linzess is better than Prevnar 13, which they claim is a pneumonia medication but I think is really a planet where Captain Kirk fought the Klingons. 

Linzess is medicine for constipation and belly pain. Yes, it is for “belly” pain and not “stomach” pain. Hey, why use a medical term in a medicine commercial? Check it out here, from the official Linzess website, complete with a cute girl with a backed up dumper:

As I was listening to the commercial I heard a couple of caveats, which I highlighted above.

  • Do not give LINZESS to children who are less than 6 years of age. It may harm them.
  • You should not give LINZESS to children 6 years to less than 18 years of age. It may harm them.

What’s the difference?
Under no circumstances should you give this to kids under 6. Nope, not at all. Don’t do it.
You shouldn’t give it to kids between 6 and 18, but maybe, if you want to, nudge nudge wink wink. We won’t tell.

Why not just say “Do not give Linzess to children who are under eighteen”? Is it OK to take a chance with a 14 year old? It does sort of hint that you can give it to an older kid. After all, you should not buy off-brand frozen fish from the dollar store but people do it all the time. So why not take a shot with your kid’s health?

What is the difference between “do not give” and “you should not give”? 
The question is Imponderable.

This has been Imponderable #134

 

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