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Mr. Blog Remembers Abe Vigoda

27 Jan

January 27, 2016

Today, the world mourns the loss of Abe Vigoda. It is our great honor, in this time of sadness, to induct him into Mr. Blog’s Hall of Fame. We will forever remember this icon.Vigoda plaque
Mr. Blog had actually met Mr. Vigoda, and in his honor, the Editors and Staff of Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride present this Classic Repost from 2010. This was the penultimate round of Mr. BTR’s contest to determine the best role model of the 1970’s. In round one, Esther Rolle (Florida Evans from Good Times) beat Mabel King (Momma from What’s Happening?). In the second round, Jack Alberston (The Man from Chico and The Man) knocked out Robert Hegyes (Juan Epstein from Welcome Back Kotter). Round three came down to The Battle of The Lawmen. Please enjoy!

From January 8, 2010

Who is the best 1970’s television role model?

Round two was a hard-fought battle of the unlikely, with “The Man” coming out of retirement to win a Charo-fueled win over Sweat Hog Juan Epstein. What did it prove? Sadly, that “The Man” can still keep a Latino down. (Just ask anyone whose bank turned them down for a loan.)

Round Three
“Battle of the Lawmen”

BARNABY JONES VS. BARNEY MILLER’S FISH          

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Barnaby Jones was a Quinn Martin production. Quinn Martin was a prolific TV producer who had the idea to cast an old man in a detective show. Unfortunately, the actor was a bit too old, as evidenced by the picture above, where Barnaby is not quite sure which is the phone and which is the gun. In the picture below, a gun-wielding thug has almost talked Barnaby into buying into his time-share.

The casting of the lead role was controversial from the start. Quinn Martin wanted an established television star for the role. After a long and deliberate casting process, he settled on this man, currently starring in the autobiographical Beverly Hillbillies:

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It was never explained just how Barnaby made the jump from hillbilly to cop, but in a strange twist, both of this round’s contestants served together in an elite peace-keeping force:

 

Detective Phil Fish was born well over one hundred years ago, yet no matter how old he was, he never looked his age. He looked at least twice his age.

Early on it was noted that Detective Phillip “Abe Vigoda” Fish bore an eerie similarity to another television personality, Richard Simmons.

 

However, as he lost his hair, he became a dead ringer for Boris Karloff.

    

As you can tell from these rare photos, the resemblance was uncanny.

Fish went on to star in a series of films with Bela Lugosi, whose main claims to fame were that he played Dracula, became a drug addict, and he played Dracula.

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This particular still is taken from 1935’s Universal release, The Cramped Fingers of Evil, starring Detective Fish as Professor Barnabas Lennsing and Bela Lugosi as Dr.Vampire J. Hammitup.

The battle was very close, but the win has to go to Fish. Why? Check out this very rare comic book from 1979. Barnaby Jones never had a view-master reel, let alone his own comic book.

WINNER: FISH

Coming Soon:

FINAL THREE-WAY
WINNER-TAKE-ALL
BRAWL-FOR-IT -ALL:

Esther Rolle Vs. “The Man” Vs. The Fish

Sephora Can’t Handle Saarah

25 Jan

January 25, 2016

Together, Saarah and I are one of Sephora’s top tweets. Too bad, since we’ve been blasting them online.

I am honored to be among the likes of Seventeen Magazine.

I am honored to be among the likes of Seventeen Magazine.

If all it takes to become a Top Tweet is to call them evil, then they should love my next tweet where I call them satanic devil worshipers. I may be their #1 all-time fan.

It all began as I detailed here, with a bad experience at Sephora on Court Street in Brooklyn. I went with Saarah and we were treated as though we were covered in feces and swastikas (i.e: not treated well at all.) We complained to a clueless “manager” named Gerald who only managed to make us feel as though we were talking to a man who somehow made it through life with only four working neurons in his brain. (Three of them were busy working his mouth, while the fourth was wondering if he just swallowed a fly.) So of course, we did what anyone else would have done. We tweeted our disgust.

twitter crop 1twitter crop 2 atwitter crop 2twitter crop 3Sephora has a crack team of social marketers. They monitor the internet, scour the web, and quickly and personally react and respond to any mention of their product. They put out fires, solve problems, and make customers happy.

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HA! I was just kidding! They have either an automated response system or an idiot working Twitter.

But I am not one to suffer idiots.

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And in case they didn’t get the message the first time:

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My retweet of Saarah’s blog became, briefly, the number 3 Top Tweet at Sephora. As I write this we are still at number 20.

Saarah was also busy tweeting at them.

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Saarah is smart. Much smarter than Sephora. It wasn’t enough to target Sephora. She also made sure to let their business partners and influential makeup bloggers know the score.

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Sephora doesn’t know what they are in for.

 

Saarah can be found on Twitter @Brooklynrants and online at Rants of a Brooklynite.

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