Archive | November, 2012

I’m Gonna Hit You, Sucka!

26 Nov

November 26, 2012

You’d think a poster this good would have a decent movie attached, wouldn’t you? Well you’d be wrong. BADLY wrong.  This film sucks, and the less said the better. But it DOES serve as a vehicle for a semi-awkward segue….

What it did however, was put me in a mood to see some real sucker punches. This one here is the current internet champion:

1)      DOWN GOES FRAZIER! DOWN GOES FRAZIER!

 “I DON’T CARE! YOU WANNA BE A MAN? I GONNA TREAT YOU LIKE A MAN!”  WOW.  Now I don’t hold with hitting women but that was some amazing uppercut. The last time you saw something like that Drago was killing Apollo Creed. Worldstarhiphop.com is a great site full of many fun videos in this vein. Highly recommended.

 

2)      EPIC FLAIL!

This was another famous one making the rounds for awhile. EPIC BEARD MAN totally whups butt here starting at 1:45. Why was that guy trying him out anyway? It was obvious that old or not, Mr. Beardman was going to be a problem for anyone stupid enough to get into it with him.   And he’s quite the celebrity. He’s been thrown out of busses, restaurants, even the Oakland A’s game.  But who’s gonna step up to him? You? I certainly won’t.

 

3)      READ THIS PALM!

Come for the policeman laying the most resounding slap you’ll ever see and stay for the hilarious commentary by Opie and Anthony, and the late Patrice O’Neal.  (Warning, mild profanity).  This represents one of the most hilarious, spontaneous takes Patrice ever had on the show.

The takeaway is that cops in other countries are not ones you want to mess around with. And when one is giving you the thousand-yard stare, you better be ready to duck.

Oh Patrice…..RIP. You’re sorely missed sir.

                      

4) McFIGHT – ROUND ONE!

You gotta be drunk to want McNuggets THAT badly. The last time I flipped out in a McDonalds at least I had a justified reason – they gave me a Quarter Pounder instead of a DOUBLE Quarter Pounder!  Unfortunately, Grimace and the Hamburgler came out and subdued me.

 

5)      McFIGHT – ROUND TWO!

This one is just low. A “grown” (physically if certainly not mentally) man swinging at a teen girl ½ his weight. On the plus side, he certainly gets the job done. On the minus side, he’s certainly not going to be served any faster now….

 

………….AND THE GREATEST SUCKER PUNCH OF ALL TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

…..Do I really need to comment?

 

Now because you sat through all of that, here’s an early Christmas present for you.  You’re welcome!

Sneak Peek of the Week of November 25th, 2012

25 Nov

November 25, 2012

Wow! Look at that crowd lined up at the Mr. BTR store! This is Thanksgiving weekend and the sales are amazing! Wacky! Get-’em while-you-can-tastic!

This week, Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride has a new doorbuster sale every day of the week!

MONDAY! HALF OFF ALLEN KEYES! Allen Keyes looks at some of the best battles you can find on Youtube. but beware- these guys don’t play fair.

TUESDAY! AMERICAN CHOPPER- GET IT WHILE YOU CAN AT 90% OFF! Yes, this show is moving fast with only 4 episodes left until the series finale. Get it before it is gone!

WEDNESDAY! BUY ONE INTRODUCTION GET ONE FREE! Introduction to what? You will get an advance peek at the all-new introduction to the third edition of Mr. Blog’s Tepid Book!

THURSDAY! A TOP TEN LIST AT ONLY TEN BUCKS! Coming late in the week will be the Top Ten Poorly conceived Holiday Specials. At that price it will fly off the shelves!

FRIDAY! A SPECIAL OVERNIGHT SALE! Pippa Middleton is famous for one thing, but we’ll ignore that and take a look at her holiday book instead.

SATURDAY! THE TREASURE CHEST OF TERRIBLE TOYS PRICES SLASHED! A special look at a special Masters of the Universe toy.

All returns must be accompanied by a receipt, prices only valid at bmj2k.com