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Dispatches From The Front: Japan, Part 2

2 May

May 2, 2012

This is the next set of selections from Allan Keyes, my brother, who is on a ten-day tour of Japan. Like last week’s installment, I’ve edited out all references to opium smuggling and multiple geisha madness.


Dispatch #4

Busy day today:

1- Took bullet train to Nagano

2- Saw the Zenkoji Temple

3- Had traditional Sukiyaki lunch (we stir fry the meat on the hot rock and dip it in broth. Yummy)

4- MONKEYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ZOMG ELEVENTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

5- Chestnut Ice Cream (with a corn flake base) delicious



Dispatch #5

SUBJECT: Tastes like it sounds

-Saw Matsumoto Castle today.  AWESOME

-Ate soba noodle lunch. DELICIOUS

-Saw a museum with old drawings. MEH

-Saw a wasabi farm. NICE! Made our own pickled wasabi.  FUN BUT IT CAME OUT FAIL. Ate Wasabi Ice Cream. Suprisingly good.

-We have traditional robes in our room, we’re wearing them to dinner. Hilarity ensues, I’m sure. Later on I’m going to the Osan, which is the hot springs baby.

In the meantime, if you open the pic you understand the subject of this email.

Mets suck!


Dispatch #6

I ate sushi and went in the public hot spring bath.  It was great.

You know what I said when I walked into the hot springs? “Me big American man”

[Editor’s note: The public hot spring baths are nude only]


Dispatch #7

I’ve been eating like a pic and LOVING it 🙂  In fact, as I write this I’m watching Hanshin Tigers vs Hiroshima Carp while eating a bag of “cut chip style potato product”

As nuts as the cities are here – and they are nuts – this country is massively beautiful. Remember the film “American Beauty” where the kid is saying how there’s so much beauty in things like a plastic bag swirling in the wind? He’s a jackass who’s full of shit. If he ever saw some of these gardens he’d take one look at that plastic bag and want to smack whoever littered.


The Editor’s and Staff of Mr. Blog’s Tepid ride would to thank Mr. Allan Keyes for the generous permission to use his emails in this blog, which I am sure he will give as soon as he gets home and reads this.

Beginning tomorrow and continuing next week, a special edition series of Picture Postcard will spotlight some of his best Japan pictures, ten each week.

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