Merry Christmas! If you grew up in the heyday of 1-900 numbers, you know you could call up a hotline and hear a special message from such luminaries as Hulk Hogan or Grandpa Al Lewis, hear a Hanukah fable, or listen to lots and lots of simulated sex. (Hey, before the internet, pre-recorded phone sex at $2.99 a minute was all we had.)
But none of them beat 1-900-909-RAPS, Santa’s Rap Hotline.
So pick up the phone, sit back relax and listen. Kids before you dial get your parent’s permission!
Mr. Blog is not a paid attorney spokesman, but Paul Teutul Sr. Is.
I used to do recaps of American Chopper every week, eventually live-blogging it as it aired. It’s a part of this blog that I’d rather forget. I am sure that watching that show killed more brain cells than if I had a motorcycle accident. But if I did have a motorcycle accident, I’m sure Paul Teutul Sr.- non-lawyer paid spokesperson – could recommend one.
Or three.
Or five.
How many lawyers does Paul Sr. shill for?
All the lawyers!
Behold the withering glower of Paul Teutul Sr.!
Those are not all the firms I found. I could have gone on and on. They shuffled lawyers in and out of the studio to stand next to the fading physique of Paul Sr., stopping just long enough for Sr. to stand and glower and (probably) call his son “numb nuts” a few times while the cameras filmed a few seconds to make it look like Sr. had some clue of the names of the people next to him.
This says less about Paul Sr. than it does for the lawyers, all of whose firms are not independent at all but part of a legal referral network that sends your case to a local law firm depending on your location.
Paul Sr. has likely not spent more than ten minutes with any of those people. That’s OK, after watching season after season of American Chopper, I can guess that Sr. had a massage appointment to get to.
Mr. Blog's Tepid Ride 
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