Tag Archives: furniture

The 5 Memes of Christmas Day 3: Crankiness

11 Dec

December 11, 2020

The 5 Memes of Christmas is a series running every Friday this month until the unveiling of the bmj2k.com Annual Fonzie Christmas Meme. Each week we will spotlight a Great Moment in Santa History from Classic TV. The theme for week three: Crankiness!

That’s Phil Foster in the hideous Santa throne above. You’d be cranky too if you had to sit in that thing while sticky kids with sticky fingers covered in goo pawed your lap and pulled your beard.

Can’t get enough of Phil Foster sitting in a chair? When Mr. Blog was a kid in Brooklyn this commercial ran all the time, where a seated Phil Foster yelled at us until we bought furniture. Watch him as he nearly slides out of his chair with fury:

What’s not fear love? That’s what made Laverne and Shirley such a hit. You never knew when Frank DeFazio would throw a gasket and smack a man right in the Pizza Bowl.

Offline and Off Target

9 Dec

December 9, 2013

The House of Blog is in disarray.

No, I don’t mean there is any political intrigue going on between the Editors and Staff of Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride, I mean that literally: My house is a mess.

I need some furniture. Target is not where I would normally go to look for a dresser, but it had a couple of things going for it: 1- it was cheap and 2- it was cheap. Now I know that when most people think of cheap furniture they think Ikea, but want a dresser whose name I can pronounce in case I need to call up customer service.

“Hello, Ikea? Hi, I bought a dresser the other day and it was missing some parts. I need a drawer, the top, and one of the sides.”
“Right ma’am.”
“Sir. I’m a sir.”
“Thank you ma’am. What model dresser did you buy?”
“Umm, it says ‘schnoor, um, flargeen, something,’ there’s a ‘o’ with a line through it, an umlaut…, er…..”

So Target was the way to go. In addition to cheap I am also lazy so I went online. There’s nothing like buying a piece of furniture you have to assemble yourself from a small picture online. This is what I found.

target

Currently unavailable online.
Not sold in stores.

Do these dressers exist? What are they doing here? I thought the point of Target’s website was to sell merchandise, not tempt and tease you with things you can’t buy.

And one of the phantom dressers has a price so secret they won’t even tell you what it is.

C’mon Target. Shape up.

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