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Sneak Peek of the Week of June 12th, 2016

12 Jun

June 12, 2016

Creature-From-The-Black-Lagoon-classic

If you’re a fan of my Lying Awake with John Newly posts, good news! There’s a new one coming up this week. 

If you’re not a fan of my Lying Awake with John Newly posts, good news! You can skip another blog this week.

This is #11 in the series of Coast to Coast AM with George Noory parodies. This one is directly inspired by an actual exchange between the caller and his expert guest. If you don’t know George Noory, he’s a very lightweight interviewer who asks naive or even inane questions but rarely listens to the answers from his guests. My Lying Awake with John Newly posts are, in my humble opinion, very accurate representations of the real program. And that’s sad. Back when Art Bell was hosting Coast to Coast, it was an intelligent and interesting show. Now, Coast to Coast is almost an insult to your intelligence. But it is often unintentionally funny!

You can find my first John Newly post right here. Then click the Paranormal-ish link at the top of the page for the rest, plus a great series of In Search Of blogs too.

 

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Star Wars Episode VIII Wish List (Spoilers? Maybe.)

3 May

April 3, 2016

TOP TEN THINGS I WANT TO SEE IN STAR WARS EPISODE VIII

1- Revenge of the wampa. Remember the wampa ice monster that captured Luke on Hoth? Luke escaped by cutting its arm off with his lightsaber. I want to see the monster, now with a cybernetic arm, come looking for payback. This would explain why no one has seen Luke for years- he’s been hiding from the wampa.

wampa02

2- Chewbacca’s pants. Chewie is a giant furry beast. Imagine how bad he must smell when he gets wet. I want part of the next film to be set on a water world, forcing Chewbacca to wear thick rubber pants and wading boots to stay dry.

3- Kung Fu. Star Wars debuted in the 1970’s, an era known for disco, polyester, and Kung Fu fighting. Disco Star Wars was a hit, but there were no Kung Fu fighting Jedi. Time to fix that mistake. Also, they must be badly dubbed.

star-wars-a-new-hope-japan

4- Finn wearing a monocle. I just want to see Finn wearing a monocle.

5- Time travel. Star Wars has never included time travel. I say it’s about time. (Pun intended.) Now that Han is dead, a grief-stricken Leia travels back in time to bring back a younger Han. Unfortunately she misses the mark by a few years and now Kid Solo is part of the Resistance. Sure he’s only 12 years old, but he’ll grow.

6- A whole bunch of Darth Vaders. Everyone loves Darth Vader. So how about a clone horde of Darth Vaders, each claiming to be the real Vader, all battling themselves? Imagine what a great lightsaber battle 570 Darth Vaders could have!

7- C-3PO’s purple foot. Anthony Daniels was not a fan of Threepio’s red arm, so much so that they had to compromise and return his golden arm by film’s end. I liked the look. It was the most character development the fussy ‘bot had in seven films. I say make it a running gag. In every film, replace some part of him with a different color appendage.

8- Batman.
batman-vs-star-wars

9- More Ewoks. Yes, I said more Ewoks. Kylo Ren’s bedroom should be filled with cuddly Ewok teddy bears, all with their stuffing hanging out from one of his angry temper tantrums. Poor kid. He had a rough life.

10- An apology. I still want someone to apologize for Episode I. (Midi-chlorians? Bah!)

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