Of the many things I never expected to read, this was not one of them.
You’ve heard of eine kleine nachtmusik? Here’s eine kleine stomachmusik
Meet Fredrik Hjelmqvist.
There’s little I can add to the jokes you must already have come up with.
And now for a little stomache music...
This man gives a new meaning to term “illegal downloads.”
Just imagine a romantic evening. A wonderful dinner, a carriage ride around Central Park, and music emanating from a man’s abdomen. What woman could resist? Sorry. I meant to say, what woman would go near him again?
Beans have long been known as the musical fruit, but swallowing this bean brings it to an entirely new level. Sure, most men have been known to toot a little from time to time, but how many of us have played three-part harmony? Alone, that is.
Just think. You find yourself pursued by the police- pop in a capsule of high-speed chase music. In a dark alley? Swallow a pill of ominous bass music. Having sex? Pop a capsule of 70’s porno music. And a Viagra. You can be your own soundtrack!
Record someone else’s voice and fool any voice recognition software. Just be sure to have an answer as to why you are holding the phone to your stomach.
Of course, an invention like this must have many serious practical applications, one would expect, though they escape me at the moment. Perhaps you can rent him out for parties…?
I fail to see the problem here. They aired The Honeymooners at one in the afternoon on a day when most people are home and sleep late. Should channel 11 have shown it at one in the morning and forced an old man to stay up to the wee hours of the night? Did he really want to be up, at age 63, watching TV at 4 am? Is this an overreaction, or can someone explain this to me? And while you’re at it, explain to me why this guy felt the need to write to the newspaper about it.
By way of comparison, these were the news stories of that day:
The gunman who shot a Congresswoman arraigned in court
Ex- House leader Tom DeLay gets three-year prison term
NYC begins investigation of snowstorm’s inept response
Wife of White House Aide found dead
Model charged with killing journalist
Honeymooners does not air until 1 pm on New Years Day (Just kidding)
Richard “Dick” Winters, decorated hero of World War II and the central figure in “Band of Brothers” died
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