Tag Archives: Happy Days

New TV Season, Same Old Games

17 Sep

September 17, 2013

Before video games, there were board games. Sure, board games are still around, but unless you are Amish you probably don’t play them. But back in “the day” (what day? I dunno) there were board games based on TV shows, and here I present 2 dozen of them from the thrilling day of yesteryear.

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Ahh, the wholesome Waltons. What a boring game this must have been, “Say goodnight, John Boy. Move back 2 spaces.”

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Meh. I was always more of a Goober fan.

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ALF! Everyone loves ALF! Go ahead and laugh, you loved him the 80’s.

board_games_based_on_old_tv_shows_07“I rolled a 4! I get to rough up a suspect!”
“I rolled a 6. I have to clean up after the bird.”

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The wackiness of war, right in your own home! Help Klinger find a cocktail dress! Search for Hawkeye’s lost tuxedo! Perform a blood transfusion on a wounded North Korean prisoner of war! Die in a mortar attack!

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I don’t know if this is based on the movie or the TV show, but in what version did that little ape kid star? None of them.

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Going way back with this one. This might be one of the only games on this list that actually lends itself to a board game.

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“Color Photo of B.A. Inside!”  YES! I have to have a color photo of Mr. T to round out my Foes of Hulk Hogan Collection!

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What? What? An All in the Family game? What do you do to win? I think this game makes us all losers.

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I’d have bought time one if I saw it.

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Any game where you can play as Sorrell Booke is OK in my book.

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Ah yes, the classic concentration camp game. Tasteless.

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No. Just no.

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Being a huge Dark Shadows fan I’d play this. Ghosts, coffins, vampires, witches, what is there not to love?

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I had this one.

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I wish I owned this one. Imagine- all the action of your favorite, dynamic tv show! “One more thing- can I borrow a shoelace? Lose a turn.”

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AAAAAAYYYYYY! Stick The Fonz’s face on anything and it will sell, even if it is a goofy cartoon picture like this.

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Not a TV-based game, but in my never-ending quest to present all things Superman I had to include it, Plus the box is just awful. imagesCAZNDRS0

I had this one too. I was actually called (check if you don’t believe me) the “up your nose with a rubber hose game” and it came with a short piece of rubber hose. For real.

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Didn’t have this, but I had the Mork action figure, which came in an interstellar egg, and the talking Mork doll. Pull the string on his back and he says “nanu nanu.”

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Bet this goes for big bucks now.

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I have never seen this show.

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From across the ocean comes this British game where old men fight Nazis. Keep it classy England.

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This is the box they went with? They stuck a small picture of Telly Savalas in the corner because they just had to have the image of the munchkin in the funny hat on the cover? Why?

Allan Keyes has FAIL SPINOFF THEMES running through his head

11 Mar

March 11, 2013

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Been on a bit of an old TV bender since Mr. B found that old People’s Court episode. So without further ado, let’s get into some fail I’ve rediscovered in the past week!

 

THE ROPERS (From Three’s Company)

Lets’s put the all-time worst right off the bat. WOMP WOMP WOMP, WOMP WOMP WOMP, WOMP WOMP WOMP, WOMP.  UGH!  Nobody even tried. It’s like they all mailed it in. The great Normal Fell dancing with a plunger. A dark day. Anyway, enjoy 6 hours of this crap if you want:

 

FLO (From Alice)

I forgot this abomination even existed. Take the wisecracking waitress from Alice, and have her move from a dumpy diner to an even dumpier truck stop down south! How did this not run 15 seasons? I mean, “Kiss My Grits” alone should’ve been good for 5 years more. Rule of thumb: Any sitcom without Vic Tayback is massively inferior to any sitcom with Vic Tayback. (Mr. BTR Says: More on Vic Taybak later!)

 

W*A*L*T*E*R  (From Mash)

Everyone remembers AfterMash (another one that should’ve been a hit. Look at the idea: Let’s just remake MASH, without the most popular characters! It’s gold Jerry, gold!) Anyway, that show was light years ahead of this awfulness. This was so bad that they stopped production halfway through the pilot.  Once Gary Burghoff inevitably failed at this, all that was left was for him was Match Game appearances subbing for Bowser. 

BONUS DEBATE QUESTION:  Trapper John, M.D. –  MASH spinoff, or just bullshit?

 

Joanie Loves Chachi (From Happy Days)

I apologize.

 

JAKE AND THE FATMAN (From Matlock if you can believe it)

What’s with this action opening? NOBODY IS MORE SEDENTARY THAN WILLIAM CONRAD. Look at the scenes he has in the intro – it features the action cigar and the action head-turn. WOWWWWWWWWW!  This intro is pure 80’s – the beach, the girls, the fast car, the saxophone solo. Feh.

 

JUST THE TEN OF US (From Growing Pains)

First of all, listen to this incredibly overwrought themesong (and remember when TV shows had time for an actual long opening credits run?) The song is all about a guy who keeps failing but he gets back up and tries, despite the fact that he keeps on “bringing home second places”

WHAT A LOAD – Let’s take a look at this. The guy is obese, cueball bald and makes the wages of a high school PE teacher.  By all rights he should be living alone in a basement apartment eating Dinty Moore beef stew every night. Instead he has a spacious house, a not-bad looking wife who obviously allows him to er….you know, whenever he feels like, and magic sperm, because he can seemingly produce good looking women, one after the other. One of those girls will snag a rich guy who will take care of Fatty McButterpants in his old age. Second place? He hit the jackpot! PS- Nice Sweatpants.

Mr. BTR Says: Vic Taybak RULES: