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Tag Archives: DC Comics

Superman, The Man of Shill (JLA Blog 3)

18 Nov

November 17, 2017

The Justice League movie opened this weekend, and as I predicted, the reviews are moderately stinky. I was hoping that we’d at least get some cool toys based on the film, but that doesn’t seem to be the case. So in honor of the mediocre film, let’s take a look back at some mediocre superhero tie-in products. 

(If anyone is still interested in buying some kryptonite rocks, I think I have some moss covered stones in my backyard. Hit me up for the hook up.)

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May 5, 2011

This week marks the anniversary of the day in 1938 that Superman Debuted in Action Comics #1.

In honor of the event I am going to showcase a few of the more obscure products which have been endorsed by Superman.

KRYPTONITE ROCKS

It’s Terrific!
It’s Fantastic!
It’s a Rock!

These are rocks painted green with glow-in-the-dark paint, $2.50 per rock, $1 shipping and handling. So what is the theory here? Why is Superman ripping off kids- er, selling Kryptonite? Superman is selling them to his friends- The Parasite better not send in $3.50- so they can take possession of the irradiated chunks of the planet Krypton and keep them safe, in lead boxes, so Superman can never come in contact with them. Ah. My God, this is easily one of the worst rip off’s I have ever seen. Selling rocks to kids. Anyone who bought these should go to the DC offices and hurl them back through the windows.

SUPERMAN PEANUT BUTTER and PEANUTS

Superman is the hero and protector of all humanity, except the approximately 0.6% of the population with severe peanut allergies and can die from anaphylaxis if they inhale even a tiny amount of peanut dust. I hope he changes Super-suits after he leaves the peanut factory or he may end up killing the very baby he rescues from Brainiac.

Check out this ad for Superman peanut butter. Superman is willing to protect the secret of its great taste with his life! I don’t blame him. Once Lex Luthor gets the secret of great taste, he can corner the peanut butter market, and how far behind can grape jelly be?

SUPERMAN CINEMATIC PICTURE PISTOL

There is a short filmstrip in the gun. You look through the hole in the back of the gun and see a frame of a filmstrip. Pulling the trigger advances the film.

This is easily, hands down, the most irresponsible toy I have ever seen. Yes, I get that this is from another era, that kids were routinely given toy guns and even real guns to play with. I get all of that. But whose idea was it to put a movie inside a gun? To teach young kids to put a gun to their heads and pull the trigger?

A movie in a gun? Thanks, Superman.

SPECIALMAN

OK, it’s a Japanese rip-off but out of all the stuff on this page, this is probably the most fun. But given the amount of lead probably used in the paint, it is likely also the most dangerous.

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The Saturday Comics: Gotham City Uncensored

26 Feb

February 26, 2014

Saturday Comics on a Wednesday?  Why not? After all, new comics don’t come out on Saturday either.

sat com logo

bb197

The Brave and the Bold 197 (1983), written by Alan Brennert, is one of my favorite Batman comics. With all of the changes in DC continuity over the last few years (OK, decades) this story is way, way out of continuity, but at one time it filled in an important part of DCU history. This is a tale of the Earth 2 Batman. Earth 2 was once the home of the Justice Society, as well as older versions of Batman and Superman. This was also the exclusive home of Huntress and Power Girl. This story tells of an older Batman, nearing retirement, and how he fell in love with and married Selina Kyle, Catwoman. The story is so good it was even reprinted in a volume of the Greatest Batman Stories Ever Told. Regardless of whether or not it fits into the current New 52 era, this issue is great reading and worth if for the Joe Staton art. For some reason it has been going up in value. You can’t find an issue on eBay for less than $10. But if you are a comics or Batman fan, this issue is worth it.

If you prefer, for just a little more, you can get the hardcover collection that contains this story and a few more, but be warned, you’ll be missing out, since there is a very slight (but interesting) change to the artwork.

Joe Staton inserted a joke into the splash page. He never expected it to get printed. He fully expected the editor to catch it, have a laugh, and take it out. But it somehow made it into print.

This scan is from my own copy.

This scan is from my own copy.

See it? Staton put in a pedophile joke, right there on the shoebox.

I don’t see how the editor missed it. I’ve had this issue for years and I spotted it long ago. But I never knew the story behind it before and luckily, Comic Book Resources already got to the bottom of it. Via CBR, here is the explanation from Joe Staton himself:

Actually I think the label was more “PED-ophile”.  Commission Gordon was holding a shoe box and at the time I thought is was funny that you might see “pedophile”  as meaning “foot lover,” not a good pun, but not such a bad name for a shoe company.

Anyway, I put it in, but back then, DC had a pretty tight editorial process so stupid jokes and personal bits were normally caught and properly disposed of.  Unfortunately, not in this case.  My stupid joke was actually inked and even printed.  Most people seemed not have even noticed it, but it looked tacky.

Later when editor Mark Waid told me that the story was going to be in a collection, I asked him to erase the label and he was happy to do so.  It was my stupid joke and I’m very grateful to Mark for letting me set it right, especially since this was one of my best jobs, on one of the very best scripts that ever came to me, with one of the very best inking jobs I ever got.

Thanks for letting me clear that up.

Mystery solved!

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