Tag Archives: cancelled

American Chopper: Impasse

26 Nov

November 27, 2012

Keep checking back as the show goes on for updates!

American Chopper (Season 9)
Impasse
PJD’s 911 Memorial Bike is in more hot water than they thought. The pranks leading up to Chopper Live rev up and Sr. and Jr. hit a snag when the production bike discussions open old wounds.

Read that again. That description is why I am thrilled this show is being cancelled, for good I hope.) They cancelled it once before but brought it back as Sr. vs. Jr.)  The pranks leading up to Chopper Live rev up. They are building the show around the stupid, fake, and totally stupid pranks leading up to Chopper Live. From feedback I’ve seen, that is the part of the show everyone hates. They could have built a whole show around the Memorial Bike. Back in the day they did just that. Shows were- hold on to your hats- about building bikes! Pranks were secondary, not a focus of the show.  With the drama around 9/11, Hurricane Sandy, and the destruction of the Memorial Bike, there is potentially a whole month of shows. But they are wasting one of the last few episodes on pranks, pushing Jesse James and Fast N’ Loud, and  ignoring the fans. But that is the usual thing for this show.

TONIGHT! JASON VS. PAULIE!
“I’m a real-life industrial designer!” BWAH HA HA! Jason! He said that!!!!! I can’t wait to see that fool take on Junior.

But I will have to wait as the show starts with OCC building some sort of beat-up car (“more rivets!”) to make fun of Paulie ahead of the build-off. It was not funny. Compare that to Paulie, who when we first see him is building a motorcycle. You remember motorcycles, those things OCC used to build? (“It is definitely the most creative thing I’ve seen from OCC in the last three years.” – Paulie, on the OCC prank car.)

Then it cuts to Senior meeting with his attorney. I won’t belabor the point I have been making for weeks, but one scene has nothing to do with either the previous scene or the one that comes after.

Meanwhile Rick, the only sane man at OCC and Vinnie, the only sane man at PJD, got together to just talk things out, from Vinnie’s meeting with Senior to the whole production bike mess. The show aired a clip from the past, when Paulie and his father were fighting in the shop and who was doing all the work in the background? Rick and Vinnie. The two men agree on one thing- the whole project is a bad idea that is getting worse.

The 9/11 bike is very rough condition, every time they look at it they find another problem. It is going to have to be broken down, engine and all, to every single nut, bolt, and gear. Salt water is a corrosive, and if you never saw salt water damage, you would not believe what it could do. It might almost be better to make a new bike.

“Any parts that move, don’t move any more.” -Vinnie.

Paulie got a call from the Governor of New York, Andrew Cuomo. “Hi Andrew,” he said. (BTW- this was a 30 second segment sandwiched between two large commercial breaks. Sigh.) But back to my point, where was the respect? They had obviously spoken before, and I am sure that at some point the Governor said “call me Andrew” but still, no “Hello Mr. Cuomo? Hello Governor?” PJD is going to the Hurricane Sandy zone to hand out much-needed supplies.

So while PJD is working on the Memorial Bike, OCC is at a place that builds shingles, fooling around in sheds, trying to blow each other over. Was it fun? For them, sure. For the viewers? No. And it was less fun, but much more stupid, when they set off a bomb in one of the sheds. You know what else it wasn’t? Impressive.

Barely mentioned last week, either here or on the show, is the fact that the OCC B-squad, a couple of guys we never saw before, are working on a bike for the Venetian Hotel in Las Vegas. The new guys fit right in- they come off as goofs. The bike isn;t getting much attention and is being done on the cheap. The Venetian is not getting its money’s worth.

At 9:44 Senior went to Jason to complain about Paulie- as usual- and asked Jason to design a logo. That is bound to make Paulie angry. And can you blame him? With all the problems of the production bike- which as yet is not even designed on paper- a logo is probably on the lowest end of the spectrum. At this point who cares? Design a bike first! But this move is CLEARLY designed to anger Paulie. And that is the old Senior coming out.


It’s 9:52, the show is almost over, it must be time for that big Jason Vs. Paulie fight they teased, right? Right?
No. It is time for more commercials!
What do I always say? They leave the only good parts of the show for the last 5 minutes. You can skip the entire show but as long as you see the last few minutes you’re fine.

9:56, finally, here we go.

Paulie, Senior, and Jason had a meeting where no one could agree on what they had already agreed on. Paulie was trying to be nice to Jason, but Jason took offense at something Paulie said about not making drawings. He argued a little but backed down, as he should. He has no dog in that fight. Paulie walked out- and maybe he was wrong- but Jason was being a jerk and looking for a fight.

Best line ever? “I’m a real-life industrial designer!” Oh Jason, you are so full of yourself. We saw his process tonight- A lot of people come up with ideas, then he draws a picture. We’ve seen years of how realistic his bikes are, so case closed.

American Chopper: Troubled Waters

19 Nov

November 19th, 2012

Tune in all through the hour as I post updates.

Didn’t know they were cancelled? Check out the news here.

Tonight
American Chopper (Season 9)
Troubled Waters
When hurricane Sandy hits, the PJD crew rushes off to rescue the 9/11 Memorial bike. Progress on the production bike stalls out when Sr. and Jr. disagree on a plan of action. Sr. and Vinnie finally face off about their past differences after five years.

We’re moving along to the next Build-Off, a two-parter airing december 10th and 11th. Tonight’s show promises to deliver the only thing I am still interested in, a face off between Vinnie and Senior. Will the show deliver? It rarely does.

The 9/11 Memorial Bike took a hit from Hurricane Sandy. According to Paul Jr, it was under 4 feet of water. Salt water. Corrosive salt water. Everything that could be rusted is rusted. The battery is corroded. It is a wreck. They are going to fix it up and bring it back to ground Zero. It is full of “seaweed and sewage” and needs to be broken down to almost the tiniest parts and refinished, and more.

Senior and his monkey decide to prank both Jesse James and Paulie. Then later they dress some dummies like the Fast N’ Furious guys and lynch them from the fans, then beat them up with hammers. Then Mike blow-torched one.  I’ll skip this very lame and obviously staged part of the show. Can they re-cancel this show right now and end it at 9:22?

Meanwhile, Senior and Junior are still not on the same page about their production bike. Paulie seems to be moving forward on his own, and Senior keeps trying to talk and get some details hammered out. And somehow, despite everything we’ve seen and heard, Paulie has no idea that they are going to form a company together. Huh?

“I guess I don’t know what I’m doing I have to give it some thought.” -Paul Jr.
“This is starting to affect our relationship.” -Senior.

Speaking of business, Paulie is trying to partner up with a t-shirt company to do a line based on their bikes. Sounds like the stuff OCC sells in  shop. But I guess Paulie is really trying to leverage the “D” in PJD. When the shirts came in later, even as jaded as I am, I have to admit that I would wear some of them. They were tha nice.

The  Big Ass Fans bike is done and it looks to me like an old school bike. No, strike that, it looks like an old bike, not the same thing. Squat, stocky, and dark, it did not impress me.

And you thought Jason was the big ass. Here is the real Big Ass of Big Ass fans.

At about 9:25 they unveil the Big Ass Bike, which is normally what closes the show, so that goes to show you how smoothly edited the show is. No segments make sense in context of what came last, it is edited with a blender. Shows are just whatever fits this week, and with only 2 regular shows left before the Build-Off, expect more jumbles to come.

At about 9:31 Senior asks Paulie about what part he wants to have in the company and Paulie says, more or less, “huh?” He wants to take baby steps.

“We have completely different ways of doing business.” -Paulie
“But there’s a standard way of doing business. Every company has contracts, and agreements, etc.” -Senior
“We’re disagreeing on the basics, like where we meet!” -Paulie
“That’s why we have contracts! To handle the basics!” -Senior

BTW, as usual, this commercial break was so  long I took a nap. From about 9:32 to 9:41 every week you can forget this show exists, since it doesn’t.

Back from commercial, finally, and Joe had a more productive meeting with Senior than Paulie ever did.
“There is something easier about the meetings back there if you know you can leave when you’re done.” -Paulie

9:48: Senior calls Vinnie and asks to have a face-to-face to work things out.
Here we go.
To commercial.
Like I say, the show is edited at random, but you can always expect the one thing you want to see stuck in the last five minutes.

Vinnie wants “more than just I’m sorry.” Senior claims he has no idea what Vinnie is angry about. Mafia-like, they meet on the side of a road.

Vinnie’s grudges:
Thousands of hours of unpaid overtime.
No respect.

Senior says:
Without me you’d be nothing.
You sued me when you quit. (Vinnie- “No I didn’t.”)
You quit without notice. (NOTE: Vinnie’s lawyer gave his notice. Senior then said he wanted it from Vinnie.)

Bottom line- Vinnie wants nothing from Senior, he is happy with where he is. He does not want to go to OCC.
“I really don’t care. If you don’t want to go that’s fine, if you do you’re welcome.” -Senior
“I guess I just shook Paul Senior’s hand for the last time.” -Vinnie.