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FUN WITH TEH INTERNETS

11 Jun

June 11, 2012

(That’s not a typo.)

Allan Keyes begins a regular gig (with a snazzy logo) today.

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Sometimes I just like to google weird things to see what images come up.  I almost always get……interesting results. Some of these I felt were worth sharing with you good people.

TODAY’S SEARCH:
FAT+ GUY+ COSPLAY

Top Five Images Found:

5:

Lemul S. Jackson

This guy isn’t bad per se, and I’m sure he’s a big hit with all the chicks at Shaft Nite at the local Fuddruckers, but come on man! Nick Fury? DUDE……this guy is more like Lemuel S. Jackson than Samuel L. Jackson. FATVENGERS, ASSEMBLE……AT THE BUFFET!

 4:

Autobots! Transform into something to hide my shame!

 If this guy is Prime, I really don’t want to see what Megatron looks like.

3:

 It’s Sailor Moo! But I gotta give him his (her?) props. Not everyone can carry off a phallic pink penile sword with that much panache

2:

For the love of God, do not look below the waist. That’s just wrong.

 I apologize for subjecting you to this guy’s gut of fury.  But you can thank me for not showing you this guy from the back!

 And the absolute runaway #1 image for searching FAT+GUY+COSPLAY:

 

MO VAUGHN HAS REALLY LET HIMSELF GO…..remember this pic taken in happier days, when Big Mo would go on to become of the biggest busts in Mets history (and yes, pun VERY intended)
 

 Got a search suggestion? Send it in!

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Imponderable #49: Cars.com

8 Jun

June 8, 2012

The Imponderable is taking a time out from the news to take a look at a popular commercial. check this out:

This is how Cars.com describes that ad:

Cars.com takes you inside the showroom of a dealership where a knowledgeable car shopper is talking to a friendly dealer. Thanks to Cars.com and a thorough side-by-side comparison, this is no ordinary visit. As they’re chatting, the car shopper’s inner confidence is unleashed from his neck and shoulder in the form of smooth Disco-singing head.  “Baby, I want that car!”

That’s not how I’d describe it.

A man with a worm-like parasite coming out of his back (or perhaps somewhere lower) tries to buy a car while the parasite, which is strangely wearing a tube-like version of he man’s outfit, clearly demonstrates its control over the man’s every move. The brain-controlling creature forces the man to buy a car from a visibly repulsed dealer.

Seriously, cars.com, the man’s confidence manifests itself as some creature out of Heinlein’s The Puppet Masters? What happened to old standby of a little miniature guy sitting on his shoulder? This is just gross, odd, and creepy. And no way is that coming out of that guy’s neck. It is at least two feet lower, and I’d bet below the waist.

Why would cars.com think a strange worm-like parasite is the way to sell their service?

The question is Imponderable.

And why that commercial is so popular is also Imponderable. I find it a total turn-off.

Buy that car!

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