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Imponderable #62: Zimbabwe Part One Week!

31 Dec

December 31, 2013

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September 21, 2012

To celebrate the return of Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride, I am doing what is going to be the BEST IMPONDERABLE EVER! And even better- I am doing it in three parts! Today, tomorrow, and Sunday you will follow the saga of the Magical Missing Underwear of Zimbabwe!

You can thank me later.

Yes! A witch hunt! A good old-fashioned witch hunt! So here’s the set up: 26 women went to sleep and woke up pantiless. The underwear was later found in the bush, which is an unfortunate pun. Prophets are being brought in to conduct a witch hunt. I don’t know about you but I am on the edge of my seat, and I’ve already read the next 2 parts!

It only gets better, much much better, from here. All I will tell you is… you cannot guess what happens next.

TO BE CONTINUED TOMORROW!

Fun With Teh Internets: Crying Kids WIth Santa (Christmas 2013)

23 Dec

December 23, 2013

What would Christmas be without our resident Grinch and Ebenezer Scrooge, all rolled up in one? Yep, it is our own Allan Keyes, from last year with a montage of his favorite Christmas images.

December 17, 2012

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He sees you when you’re sleeping…..he’s kinda creepy actually.

Bringing your children to see Santa Claus is a time-honored tradition. The kids wait with breathless anticipation for the chance to rattle off all the toys they want Santy to bring them : A pony, a football, a Red Ryder BB Gun, a dollie, some Dockers, an Ipad, a crossbow, Knicks season tickets, a subscription to  The Economist, and the complete Sanford and Son on Blu-Ray (these are some interesting kids!)

What can be more American than that? How heartwarming, how heartstring-tugging. How cute! So of course, since I’m a dirtbag, we’re going in the total opposite direction. BAZINGA!

Fun With Teh Internets:  CRYING KIDS WITH SANTA

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Mom, forgive me but I HAVE to comment here. This poor child is not only being scarred for life, but he looks an awful lot like Don Knotts:

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She’s crying because this is a pathetic attempt at being a Santa. HINT: Just because you may have a beard already doesn’t excuse you from wearing a REAL FAKE beard. And put on the red suit also will ya? God, put a little effort into it man

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Looks like SOMEONE is getting a visit from the ghost of Christmas future! (PS- A Christmas Carol absolutely sucks, unless it’s the Mr. Magoo version, or Captain Picard is starring in it)