If I Won The Lottery

31 Jan

January 30, 2014

If I won the lottery, for millions of dollars, maybe 500 million of them then I’d buy a house, buy my mom a house, quit my job, buy a solid gold toilet, yada yada yada, all the usual stuff people say they’d do. Sure, I’d pay off my credit cards, invest in the stock market, ride a hippo in the Kentucky Derby, all the usual things people do when they become filthy stinking rich.

But that’s not my dream.

I’d speed down the highway. wind whipping my hair, enjoying the envious stares of the other drivers, as I zoom past them in the coolest car in the world.

The Batmobile.

Batmobile

There is NO COOLER CAR IN THE WORLD.

Sure, I considered other cars.

  • The A-Team van? Too enclosed. No one would see whooping and hollering.
  • Magnum’s Ferrari? (OK, Robin Masters’ Ferrari.) Very cool, but still just a Ferrari.
  • KITT? Only if I could use the turbo boost to jump over traffic.
  • The General Lee? Not without shooting dynamite arrows out the window, and that might get me into too much trouble.
  • And The Millennium Falcon? Not technically a car.

And if I were driving the Batmobile, I would finally have a legitimate reason to wear a cape.

 

I’d drive the Batmobile down the highway just to see the look of envy on every other driver’s face. All those mooks in their Hyundai’s and Ford Fairlanes, drooling over the Batmobile, wishing they were me, wearing my cape, zooming down the highway, with somebody dressed as Robin in the front seat, or maybe just a classy escort I rented for the day (hey, I’m rich!) I’d get the whole thing on YouTube, it would go viral, and I’d do it again the next day. Unless it was raining. There’s no top on the Batmobile. That’s why Batman never fought crime in bad weather, and you just know that if it rained and he opened up an umbrella, it would be one the Penguin’s rigged explosive umbrellas. 

Oh yes, to be rich. I can just picture it now.

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images5XY83URF

 

That could be me! What a great Batman I’d make. OK, I’d probably break a lot of traffic laws and definitely wouldn’t stop any crimes, but my dream isn’t to tangle with the Riddler, it’s to zoom down the highway in the Batmobile. So you can take you other lottery dreams (flying to the moon, buying an island in the Pacific) and forget it. I’ve got you beat.

 

bmj2k batman

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8 Responses to “If I Won The Lottery”

  1. T E Stazyk January 31, 2014 at 2:25 pm #

    With 500 million you could be Batman and Bruce Wayne. And hire Alfred!

    Like

    • bmj2k January 31, 2014 at 11:40 pm #

      See the casting news? Jeremy Irons is Alfred in the Batman vs Superman movie.

      Like

  2. Mac of BIOnighT February 1, 2014 at 2:30 pm #

    I have the Frogmobile (this is my car, really http://pupos.home.sapo.pt/novidades/twingo_verde_vertigo.gif )

    Like

    • bmj2k February 1, 2014 at 2:48 pm #

      I love that color. One of my faves.

      Like

      • Mac of BIOnighT February 1, 2014 at 2:56 pm #

        Shall we swap cars? I give you the Frogmobile and you give me the Batmobile 😉

        Like

        • bmj2k February 1, 2014 at 6:23 pm #

          Why don’t we both share a ride in the Back to the Future car?

          Like

          • Mac of BIOnighT February 1, 2014 at 6:26 pm #

            The Batmobile is still the best, I’ll wait for you to win the lottery and take a ride in it (but I refuse to wear green underpants and a yellow cape)

            Like

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