November 21, 2011
The next big made-up event starts this week as motorcycle builder and noted dirtbag Jesse James “challenges” both OCC and PJD. Jesse James must have a good agent. Lord knows he doesn’t have a good therapist. He’ll fit right in.
As has been covered extensively on this site for the last few weeks, PJD continues the 9/11 bike. For those of you who may have missed it, here it is again.
The build continues on the 9/11 bike throughout the show, but I feel like we all know how it comes out so forgive me if I skip the details.
OCC continues the al-Qaeda bike, also known as the Arabian Horse Bike. I haven’t seen anything this silly since Chavo Guerrero’s little stick pony.
While OCC waits for parts for the horsey bike, they go to Grainger, a tool company, to get free stuff, shill for them, and plug. I mean get ideas for a bike. Noticeably absent on a trip to see the clients and get ideas for their bike is Jason Pohl, the OCC “drawer.” Hey, why would the guy who designs the bikes need to meet the clients and see what they sell?
Senior: “It is a complicated bike because Jason has pipes criss-crossing each other, and you can’t have pipes crossing each other because the bike will never run.” So Mike had to come up with a work-around. JEEZ JASON, learn something about bike building! It is your career!
Jason: “Hey I’m a horse! And I’m a gas tank!” Yeah, he said that at the unveil. The tank looks like a horse with a spike running through its head.
Enter Jesse James. He related some strange, curse-filled dream about him and Paul Senior fishing or something, it made no sense. Oh man, this guy is a wreck. He makes Mikey sound smart.
He compared the Teutuls to cake designers. They don’t make the batter, or mix the mix, they just decorate the cakes, the bikes. Yeah, a lot of people have said that, but look at this episode and say that about Paulie’s bike. You can’t. So of course Jesse James decided to send them pornographic cakes. If the effect he wanted was to make himself look like a tool, he achieved his goal.
Is he still sober?
He said a lot of other things about Paulie and Senior, and a little of it made sense, and a lot of it sounded like he was stupid or high or both. I won’t comment on his bikes until I see the one he makes for the build-off, but I hope he builds better than he talks.
The producers had nothing important for Mikey to do this week so he conducted an investigation into the cake.
(Right about this point, I have to ask myself what happened to the show I used to love? Lousy horsey bikes? Jesse James and porno cakes? And more Jason Pohl? Where did this show go wrong?)
If you ever need a funny sound bite, get the clip of Mayor Bloomberg talking motorcycles.
NEXT WEEK
Get ready!
You won’t believe what’s coming!
It’s…..
.
.
.
…another clip show.
Seriously? Another one already? This is getting near bait and switch territory.
BEST PRANKS Nov. 28, 2011
Dummies come to life, spitballs fly and air horns blast in this behind-the-scenes special. But what’s a workplace without air-gun war, scooter jousting and helicopter drops?
Ive always had a great deal of respect and admiration for Jesse but i dnt care for the punk routine sht he pulled wth the cakez lost all respect for the man. Jesse y not just do ur thing act like a grown man step away from the pipe and show it through what all or most of the fans know u had tallent. Totally classless !!!!
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Jesse ur a f in loser n a asshole
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YOU are pretty fun man!
Thanks for writing.
Pohl
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Few thoughts….
1) That freaking horse looked like a carousel ride u see at an amusement park. And Sr sends Jason to the unveil and Christian rides up on dirst and gravel. Well planned unveil.
2) How many times are OCC “employees” starting every sentence with, “we have so much work going on right now,” or “we are so busy at the shop,” etc…hmmm, really?
3) It is getting beyond sad that producers have literally run out of ideas what to do with a sober Mikey
4) Me thinks that Sr. and Jr will come together again becuase of Jesse.
5) And I don’t blame Jr. for this becuase everyone seems to do it, but, the people on 9/11 weren’t “lost” — they were brutally murdered!
6) PJD did a great job with the bike but if they really wanted to capture the 9/11 Memorial, they should have left it unfinished!
Okay, I think I’m done — thanks for playing!
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I really wish I wrote #6. Bravo.
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As usual, awesome review my friend! Those crazy bike-building maniacs never disappoint, do they?
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Jessie your a punk
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ALL THE BIKES ARE INTERESTING , I DONT CONSIDER PAUL SR. VEHICLE A PROPER BIKE IN A BIKER BUILDOFF. I THINK PAUL JRS BIKE IS FABULOUS BUT SINCE I COLLECT BIKES BUILT BY AIRCRAFT COMPANYS. JR S BIKE IS A DIRECT RIP OFF OF A R100 IMME WHICH WAS THE BIKE THAT INSPIRED THE GUIGGENHEIM ART OF THE MOTORCYCLE SHOW. I WANT YOU TO GO TO GOOGLE IMAGE AND NOTICE ON THE IMME R100 SWING ARM IS THE EXAUST TRY TO DO THAT . JESSIE S BIKE IS THE ONLY BIKE I CONSIDER IT CLEAN AND SIMPLE, TASTEFUL .
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Oh boy, what a show!! Jesse knows how to swear (so many bleeps I thought we were having a civil defense alert). Sandra Bullock has questionable taste in men. Paul Jr. can only build “theme” bikes. The P51 deserved better than this even though it was a replica and Jr. had a chance to show that he could build a real motorcycle and didn’t. OCC now builds snowmobiles that spin in circles and shoot fire (where do I line up to get one). And the person at The Discovery Channel that thought of this fiasco should be fired. Other than that a pretty good show and I was dumb enough to watch the whole thing and will watch the show tonight also. There’s three hours of my life I’ll never get back.
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I dont know where to start! First of all how do you bring a butter knife to a gun fight? That garbage that OCC came with was a complete joke. I remember when Paul Sr. made fun of Paul Jr. for not being able to submit a drawing , well Paul Jr. does not and probably never will need a drawing to outbuild “THE DRAWER”. How does Paul Sr. let someone who is not a bike rider or a bike builder run with the ball in a biker build-off when he used to question every single move that Jr. would ever make , are you crazy? What he brought to the build-of wasn’t even a bike , in all honesty it was a hybrid flamethrowing snowmobile. I know Sr. felt just like a idiot afterwards and I know it burns him up to lose to Paul Jr. for the second time in a build-off in stunning fashion with real judges and real winners and losers. I could be wrong but I don’t remember seeing Paul Sr. congratulate Paul Jr. for a job well done (Please correct me if I’m wrong)and when Paul Jr. hugged his father and told him that he loved him it looked just like Paul Sr. didn’t want to have anything to do with him. How is it that you have one of the best tank builders in the business and you completely take him out of the equation in a build-off of this magnatude and listen to this clown , are you crazy? AS for Jesse James I give him credit for his bike building skills but there is no way in hell that he can outbuild Jr. he’s not creative enough , to outbuild Jr. you have to have vision , imagination and be able to think outside the box which Sr. nor Jesse can do. Nice bike Jesse but that bike wasn’t better than any of Paul Jr’s web theme bikes , better luck next time. Maybe you should stick to womanizing and picking out perverted cakes it seems like that’s where your real passion is at. Paul Jr. gets points from me just on being humble and not stooping to the level of Jesse or his Father afterall there is no need because there is no competition there at all , when he said that the exhaust was gonna exit through the tank I just broke out laughing because I loved it , I really can’t say much more Go Jr. Go.
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I just read some comments from another website about Jr’s bike not being ridable and how you can ride Jesse’s bike everyday , but I thought a build off was supposed to be about creativity in design not only about ridability and if that’s the case it’s PJD hands down , later for OCC and later for Jesse James. I’m tired of the old school designs with the tailpipes sticking straight up in the air or sissy poles with spades on the end , come on already enough is enough. How does one man send a cake to another man with a penis on it , are you kidding me , yeah your a real tough guy Jesse , I bet the real men out there didn’t even know that a website or a company like that even existed , I sure didn’t and I still don’t care to know about it. I wonder how many of those cakes that you have ordered and how many hours that you have spent staring at them , if this was a snowmobile contest then it’s OCC hands down and if it’s a penis cake baking contest then it’s Jesse james privates parts up. Jesse stop sword fighting in the bathtub with your bike building buddies ON GUARD!!!!!
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In the Caddy build off, if it were a blind vote where no one knew who built whcich bike the vote would have been closer. Paulie still weold have won but it would not have become a popularity contest. This time, it might be- I have no idea if it is true- Sr might have realized that since he is son unpopular he’d never win, so by building that thing he could use the fact that he didn’t build a bike as an excuse.
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