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Imponderable #113: Sydney Australia

18 Oct

October 18, 2013

Why did the chicken cross the road?” finally has an answer.
Because he was blind.”
And then he fell in a pool and drowned. But it was OK! Really, it all worked out fine. Read on!

chk1

Aww, poor Chooky Wooky. He must be the luckiest chicken alive. And what do you think of Chooky Wooky as a name? That’s either Chewbacca’s son in the next Star Wars movie or it is what I’m going to name my kid. I hope she likes it!

Anyway, I think this story is great. Heartwarming, really, very touching. Autistic girl, favorite pet, blind animal, rescue, and reunited. It has it all! (OK, it doesn’t have explosions, karate, or gratuitous and big-breasted female nudity but hey, it has a blind chicken, and that has to count for something.)

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This is the real-life Chooky Wooky and his new girlfriend

It took three hours of mouth-to-mouth, girl-on-chicken action to bring that fowl back to the land of the living. Good thing chickens don’t have souls or he’d be back as a zombie!

I have to wonder. Where would you draw the line? Would you perform CPR on a beloved snake? A weasel? A musk ox? Even a family’s beloved pet chicken is borderline, I’d think, given salmonella and all that. I guess it all depends on how you feel about chickens. For this I defer to George Costanza:

GEORGE: Do you think chickens have individual personalities?
KRAMER: (shivering) I don’t know.
GEORGE: If you had like five chickens could you tell them apart by just the way they acted? Or would they all just be walking around? Bak, bak, baak, bak? Cause if they have individual personalities I’m not sure we should be eaten `em.

Would you spend three hours performing CPR on a blind chicken?
The question is Imponderable.

But I would not.

Don’t you think that “Blind Chicken” would have made a great name for an old Southern blues man? Clarence “Blind Chicken” Perkins, for example. On the other hand, it also sounds like one of the Hekawi Indians on F Troop.

The Inappropriate Gorilla

8 Oct

October 8, 2013

Do you like curry?
I do not.

I think it stinks. Put it in my meal and you can keep it. Don’t want it. Won’t touch it.
And that’s a problem.

My girlfriend is a great cook. She can cook anything and it all tastes great. But the trouble is, she likes curry.
Loves it.

I do not.

So it can be a little bit of a problem when she cooks for me because she is likely to put curry in anything, including pancakes.

But that is my cross to bear in life.

HOWEVER, there is one circumstance where I can get firmly behind curry, Where I say “bring it on” and while I won’t touch that crap, I’ll gladly back the fact that it is there.

gorilla

This is a shop in Manhattan and no, I’ve never been there. Don’t want to go in there either. But I love gorillas and stick a gorilla on a sign and you’ve got a store that I’m all for. Won’t try the food, but I love the sign. I have no idea what a gorilla has to do with curry, but as I always say, everything is better with gorillas.

That seems to me to be the most inappropriate use of a gorilla that I can imagine.

BTW- not only is that Kodak film’s colors, it looks like they used the same font as well.