Archive | July, 2013

Space Jammed

17 Jul

July 17, 2013

Former New York Knicks player Baron Davis was abducted by aliens a few weeks ago. I’ll let him tell it in his own words.

“I was, um, on my way from Vegas here to L.A., I’m a little tired and s— and I see this light and I think it’s a big-a– truck. Then next thing you know, dude, like, I was in this f—— steel thing.”

It didn’t end there. In many abduction stories, there is a period of blackout and often the victim’s next memory would be heading home some hours later. Not so Davis. He recalls meeting “these f—— crazy-looking people” who were “half-human, half, like, f—–, ugly motherf——.”

In fact, Baron has some clear recollections of that evening. “Dude, they were poking me on my nose and s—. They were poking me on my nose and they were, like, looking me in my eyes. They had my hands like, tied up and the next thing you know, I was f—— in Montebello, dude, burning rubber on the way back to L.A. It was like four o’clock in the morning.”

Davis later recanted the story, claiming it was all a joke.

(http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/baron-davis-abducted-aliens-article-1.1397660)

Judging from his outfit, I tend to believe it.

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What was it?

16 Jul

July 16, 2013

I ate in this great Chinese Mexican place this weekend. The décor was very authentic odd, and strangely, the restaurant was Kosher Halal didn’t serve pork.

So what’s going on here?

I’m not sure. The place had a Mexican-style name that I am totally sure was 100% inauthentic. It was along the lines of Quetzalcoatltitio Mexican Grill. The manager/owner/hostess was Chinese, as was the waitress and, as far as I could tell, the kitchen staff.  The window proclaimed that they do not serve or cook pork yet when asked, the hostess explained that they were not kosher or halal, they just cater to people who do not like pork. (As far as I know, those people who make an issue of pork in their food are usually kosher or halal.) The restaurant was decorated with Mexican designs and things like serapes and Mexican tile, yet also with large party streamers hanging from the ceiling, each with a Thomas the Tank Engine character hanging from it. On the wall was a huge poster of Thomas wishing you a happy ninth birthday. Thing is though, they all seemed to have been up for a long time. They were not new

The hostess (and if my girlfriend ask you I never said this) had very large breasts pressed together and spilling out of her top, and she drew (even more)attention to them by wearing the largest jade pendant I have ever seen. It was about the size and shape of a deck of playing cards. My girlfriend works in the area and the hostess pretended to recognize her, and in turn my girlfriend pretended to recognize the hostess. It was very surreal.

So I am not sure what this place really was but the food was very good.

 

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