Tag Archives: Whitman Mayo

The Astounding Blogger of the Year Award

2 Jan

January 2, 2013

Over the course of 2012, it has been the honor of the Editors and Staff of Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride to receive a great many awards and nominations for a variety of blogging awards, some of which you see published below. And we are especially grateful to have been nominated more than once for each of these awards. I am now a multiple Versatile Blogger Award-winning blogger, as well as a multiply Inspiring Blogger and even a double Blogger of the Year.

vers

very insp

And so forth and so on, yadda yadda yadda. These are all pretty harmless, if somewhat silly. There is no real award, there are just people who make up “awards” and give them to their friends who make up awards and give them to their friends who gave them awards in the first place. Let’s say what they really are- ploys to drive up traffic, since each comes with a silly set of rules requiring the “winners” to answer 5 to 10 silly questions about themselves (“When did you first begin blogging?” “Which flowers bloom in your imagination?”) and then pass the “award” on to 10 or 12 other bloggers, who pass it on the 10 or 12 more, etc  etc etc.

It is the blogging version of a chain letter.

But they are really no big deal and they make people happy and if someone wants me to be the Motivation Blogger Award winner, than far be it from me to complain. But to foist this on 10 other unsuspecting bloggers and make them slough it off to another 10, each of whom has to answer a set of ridiculous questions is not something I want to be a part of. There is enough unwanted spam in the world.

So it is in this spirit, or perhaps in direct contraction of it, that I announce that Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride at bmj2k.com, Your Daily Dose of the Absurdities of This Absurd World, has both created and awarded to itself as the first recipient, the Astounding Blogger of the Year Award.
 PHONEY BLOG AWARD

Thank you, thank you, please be seated. I am humbled by your applause, and your standing ovation? Well deserved, I admit.

What makes this award special is that every time you are nominated, you are entitled to another Whitman Mayo. As you can see, I have been nominated nine times. And even better, I have twice been decorated with the Golden Crown Whitman Mayo. Truly, none have been so honored since the dawn of time.

This award represents the pinnacle of the blogging arts.

As a condition of the award, the winner of the Astounding Blogger Award promises not to foist it upon any other person or site.

However, that shouldn’t stop you.

Pick five sites that you feel deserve this made-up award and post a link to this very page so that they may claim their award and proudly display it on their site. But there’s a catch! Each “winner” must answer the questions below and post them on their site.

1- How does Cthulhu affect your everyday life?

2- Who would win in a fight- Kirk or Picard?

3- Which flowers bloom in your imagination?

4- You see that thing last night? What’s up with that?

5- Do you really want to live in world where men wear meggings?

That’s it. Simple, right? So go on out and pick five sites that you feel embody the history and the majesty of the Astounding Blogger Award and give them the honor of this prestigious decoration.

As for me, I’m off to write my acceptance speech for Cattle Rustler Blogger of the Year.

Blank Award:

PHONEY BLOG AWARD blank

Whitman Mayo:

circle mayo small

Gold Crown Mayo:

circle golden mayo with crown small

Who is the best 1970’s television role model? FINAL ROUND!

19 Jan

January 18, 2010

Who is the best 1970’s television role model?

Round Three was a hard fought brawl between two icons of justice, Barnaby Jones and Abe Vigoda. Despite heavy Geritol use and accusations of Viagra-juicing, the clear winner was Fish, setting up our

FINAL ROUND
THREE-WAY
WINNER-TAKE-ALL
BRAWL-FOR-IT -ALL:
Esther Rolle        Vs.     “The Man”        Vs. The Fish                               
“panties”                 “Which way to the Wonka-crapper?”    First GQ cover

Before declaring a winner, let’s take a final look at our contestants.

I’m not sure what is going on in this picture, but JJ sure looks uncomfortable. Any minute I expect Chris Hansen to walk out of Thelma’s bedroom and offer some lemonade.

Here we see Jack “The Man” Albertson in a scene from the 1977 made-for TV movie, “Not Without my Psoriasis,” which exposed the then-little known danger of moles and skin lesions.

For decades, Abe Vigoda has been plagued by rumors of his death. These rumors began in 1978, when he actually died, and later came back as a mummy.

Here we see him attending his own funeral:

Before we reveal the winner, what does the Best 1970’s TV Role Model win? This fabulous trophy!

No, not those fabulous trophies, this fabulous trophy:

Before we reveal the winner, let’s take a look at two men who almost made the finals.

 QUINCY, M.E.

Quincy was ruled ineligible when it was discovered that he used performance enhancing drugs and lied to Congress during the MLB steroid inquiry.

 FRED MERTZ

Despite having died in 1966, we wanted to include him for the memorable TVLand commercial that featured his pants.

 Yes, his pants.

AND THE WINNER IS:

 WHITMAN MAYO!

Whitman Mayo?

Yes, Whitman Mayo.
Whitman Mayo: Sanford and Son’s Grady.
Whitman Mayo:  Diff’rent Strokes mean Uncle Jethro, who tried to take Willis and Arnold away from Mr. Whitey, er, I mean Drummund.
Whitman Mayo: Star of

 Crash Corrigan Meets The Kelp Men


This serial is also notable as the first clothed appearance of porn star Monte Blue.

In this serial, Whitman Mayo spent 13 spine-tingling chapters evading this tin can robot:


Eventually, Whitman Mayo defeated the robots with a device that looked suspiciously like a cross between a fishing pole and a view master. In Chapter Eleven, Flaming Death, Mayo cemented his status as the Best TV Role Model of the 1970’s when he first uttered the immortal words that would become his catchphrase, “Great Googly Moogly!”

That locution, that seedy beard, that eerie resemblance to Wally “Famous” Amos, truly, the Best TV Role Model of the 1970’s!

One can only wonder what would happen if he were pitted against the Best TV Role Model of the 1980’s…..

NOT COMING SOON:

Who Has The Best TV Mustache?