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Imponderable: Tokyo Japan

4 May

May 4, 2012

In keeping with this week’s Japan theme here is a Classic Imponderable from Tokyo.

July 7, 2011

Japan strikes again

I’ve covered the cyberhug before. And while not everyone agrees with me, I still say Japan is nuts. If there is a wacky computer product or bizarre sex video the odds are it comes from Japan. Whether it is a game based on urinating, an elderly porn star, or an electronic French kiss, it is clear that the Japanese have some issues to work through.

I don’t see the attraction of tongue kissing my computer. Of course I also get out of my house and interact with real people from time to time so I may not be in the target audience for this thing.

I also worry about the possibility of electrocution.

The researchers are working to replicate an individual’s taste, breathing, and tongue moisture, but since they want to create “celebrity” kissing apps, will they have to replicate each star’s specific bad breath and body odor? Could we one day have the ability to experience Robert De Niro’s tobacco breath in our mouth? Lindsey Lohan’s stink after a drunken binge? And popular and funny she may be, but would you want to tongue-kiss Betty White? Through a computer or not, there’s a limit.

And this being Japan, the potential for fetish is endless. I won’t get into it but in Japan you can buy used panties from a vending machine. ‘Nuff said.

I can only wonder about who comes up with this, but I wonder more about the volunteer who tests this.

Who is the person who is waiting for the day they can stick a straw in his mouth, kiss his computer, and pretend it is Ed Asner?

The question is Imponderable.

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Late Night Movie House of Crap: The Newlywed Game

19 Apr

April 19, 2012

For those of you unfamiliar with the classic version of The Newlywed Game (not the awful version with Carnie Wilson) check this out and then I’ll be back to explain some more.

This was a Chuck Barris-produced show in which married couples were split up and asked the same questions. One partner had to predict how the other would answer the same question and the couple with the most matches won. Simple. The fun of it was that the host, Bob Eubanks, had the amazing ability to ask even the most innocent question in a sexually-tinged way. Of course, there were few “innocent” questions- the phrase “making whoopie” popped up a lot- but even the innocent ones were designed to sound dirty. And it helped that the contestants were not chosen for their Mensa scores.

What I am posting next is one episode in its entirety, in three parts. This is the notorious “Archie and Edith” episode in which the contestants look and sound and act eerily like the Bunkers from All in the Family. I won’t spoil it for you, but wait for the exchange that follows “think of the children.”  But don’t count out the other contestants. There is a strange man with a poor command of the English language who looks very much like Patrick Troughton and his young wife. (She married for money, he for a green card is my theory.) There is the snooty banker-type (his moment to shine comes late in part three) and the man whose remark about premeditation hints at more in his past than I would like to speculate.

Settle back and watch this all the way through. I first caught this episode on the Game Show Network a few years ago and I still have it on my TiVo today. Enjoy it now and thank me later.

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