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Sneak Peek of the Week of October 2nd, 2011

2 Oct

October 2, 2011

Ladies and gentlemen, back by popular demand, Jackie “The Jokeman” Polyphemus! Give it up for Jokeclops!

We’ve got a great show for you this week. As always our headliner, The American Chopper Weekly Rundown will be in the main room, and we’ll offer you a fudgesicle, ponder your Imponderable urinary health, ask the immortal question “is it just me or is it hot in here?” and continue our life of a teacher. All this, Saturday Comics looks at another legend, and more, on Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride.

A New York Legend (2)

29 Sep

September 29, 2011

This New York Legend is fat-packed with semi-scientific suppositions and imaginary engineering.

Beneath New York City, far below the sewers, underneath even the roaring subway, runs a series of water tunnels stretching from the Hudson River to the west to the East river on the opposite shore. These man-made subterranean waterways were constructed almost 100 years ago. They radiate into and out of a large chamber nearly a full block in width, located directly below a particular building on 5th avenue.

The water rushing into the chamber is harnessed to create hydroelectric power, which is used to operate a massive turntable. This piece of engineering is aligned perfectly with the building’s central axis and is stabilized by and synchronized to three 100-foot gyroscopes, ensuring that the turntable is attuned to the Earth’s rotation.

The entire system is accessible only at one point, through a an ordinary looking and unmarked door at the end of a long but unremarkable corridor just off the building’s main lobby.

Most people can’t tell you what the purpose of the gyroscope is, and in fact nearly no one but a very elite few know of its existence, but if you find yourself in mid-town Manhattan at 4am on a particular morning in early May, you just might notice that a certain tall building seems to have slightly rotated in its foundation by exactly 4.675 degrees. And if you direct your gaze upward, you might notice that the building’s antenna lines up perfectly with a certain celestial object.

Can you say it isn’t true?

Keep watching the sky!

This New York Legend is another one from New York radio legend Long John Nebel’s back catalogue, with confabulation and obfuscation by yours truly.

An audio version of this legend first appeared just last week in the amazing FlashPulp website. Check them out for awesomeness and goodies!