February 9, 2015
If Abe Lincoln were to come back to life, I would NOT waste time asking him about freeing the slaves or writing the Gettysburg Address. The guy came back from the freaking dead! I think my first question would be “how did you do it?”
It would probably go something like this:
Abe: I remember writing Four Score and-
Me: OH MY GOD! ABE LINCOLN! HOW THE HELL DID YOU COME BACK FROM THE DEAD?
December 27, 2014
Unbelievably, this is the first appearance of the Tepid Zombie in 2014. Before that, he’d been a pretty constant presence, either reviewing odd things on Netflix, making zombie-complaints about the news, or just generally talking about eating brains. (You can find his old posts here.) For those new to the Tepid zombie, this is a look at what this blog would (or maybe I should say “will”) look like after the zombie apocalypse when this blog will be written by a zombie. He’s an accountant, by the way, and kind of lazy.
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