Archive | Blogging RSS feed for this section

Snappy Answers to Stupid Headlines, August 2014

3 Aug

August 3, 2014

Hello, Devoted Readers. I’m sure both of you will get a kick out of this. (I’m kidding, I’m kidding. I know for a fact that I have more than two devoted readers. My great aunt and her sewing circle call me every Sunday morning to complain.)

Journalism is certainly taking a beating in recent years, and frankly it deserves it. Take these actual headlines which appeared this weekend on newser.com. (Their motto: We’re the meh of the internet.)

bad timing

“‘Bad Timing’ Wiped Out Dinosaurs. Asteroid Hit At Just The Wrong Time, Researchers Say.”

So when is the right time for an asteroid to hit? Maybe if it had hit at night, when all the dinosaurs were safely tucked in bed, they would have made it. Or maybe it if had hit on a weekday when the dinosaurs were in school, they could have done the old duck and cover and hidden under their desks. Too bad the asteroid had to hit on a sunny  summertime Saturday afternoon when all the dinosaurs were at the beach, no shelter in sight.

cannibal

“Why Cannibalism Is Bad For Your Health”

I suppose it depends on whether you are the eater or the appetizer. Seriously, I can’t think of a situation where cannibalism would be good for your health.

ikea

“Woman Finds 80 Skeletons Crammed Into Ikea Bags. Gruesome Discovery Made in Swedish Church.”

I thought Ikea was a Swedish church. Whenever I buy something there, I pray it doesn’t fall apart.

But seriously, when the woman got home, she discovered that they were missing parts, two femurs and a metacarpal, plus she lost the little wrench Ikea uses to put everything together.

.

 

The Saturday Comics: Mutts Comic Cons 2014

30 Jul

July 29, 2014

cropped-sat-com-logo.jpg

Every year at San Diego Comic Con time, Patrick McDonnell turns over a week of his brilliant Mutts strip to superheroes. Too bad for them, they are always tormented by Bip and Bop, a pair of squirrels, sure to be their newest arch-villains, who live in what must be the most perfect tree in the world, as every hero is compelled to spend a few minutes in its shade. In the past, he’s done DC heroes one year, Marvel the next, but this time he’s mixed them up. Bonus points if you can identify the classic cover he’s paying homage to in the Sunday strip.

muttsmon