Not-So-Imponderable #1: The [CENSORED] From China

29 Jun

June 29, 2014

Before we begin, a notice from The Editors and Staff of Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride:

nsfw

I often get on Japan for being, let’s face it, totally weird. Sexbots, sexbots, sexbots everywhere! Now before you hop on a jet to the Land of The Rising C-, no, no I won’t go there, beware! The following product was invented across the sea in China.

TADA!

Hey, baby. Come here often?

Hey, baby. Come here often?

This, ladies and gentlemen (but mostly gentlemen), is the world’s first fully automatic hands free sperm extractor.

Or as I call it, the Roboblow. And yes, it does just what you think it does.

The effortless machine features a massage pipe that can be adjusted to suit the height of the user. All the gentleman has to do is plug in the frequency, amplitude and temperature and off they go. It’s also fitted with a small screen for those feeling uninspired.
The reason this is not an Imponderable is that this was inevitable. Sure so far it is only installed in hospitals, but can you think of a better machine to put in a bar? This will totally change the dating scene forever.

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10 Responses to “Not-So-Imponderable #1: The [CENSORED] From China”

  1. Mac of BIOnighT June 29, 2014 at 12:05 am #

    At this point, I wonder what the other machines beside it are for…

    Like

    • bmj2k June 29, 2014 at 12:10 am #

      LOL, I don’t want to know!

      Like

  2. zathra June 29, 2014 at 12:30 am #

    It beats that awkward waiting in a sperm bank / donation center. & if it’s in a BAR, alcohol can help the process along. After all, it IS the ” social lubricant “.
    Giggity. 🙂

    Like

    • bmj2k June 29, 2014 at 12:37 am #

      Can you imagine if this becomes available for personal use at home?

      Like

  3. T E Stazyk June 29, 2014 at 2:34 am #

    Currently only in hospitals? What are they treating??

    Like

    • zathra June 29, 2014 at 3:02 am #

      So much for China’s one – child -to – a – family policy. Unless this is a method of reducing the rate of reproduction by lowering libido.

      Like

      • bmj2k June 29, 2014 at 8:02 am #

        This has to be a part of that policy- sperm in that machine can’t impregnate anyone.

        Like

        • T E Stazyk June 29, 2014 at 5:53 pm #

          Especially if they watch that video and think it a finger massager!

          Like

          • bmj2k June 29, 2014 at 6:50 pm #

            This is China. I imagine that the video is one of the party leaders yelling at them “you must inseminate now!”

            Like

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  1. An Imponderable Tale of Animal Poop | Mr. Blog's Tepid Ride - July 14, 2014

    […] been some time since I pandered to the lowest common denominator. It has been about two weeks since The [CENSORED] From China, and it doesn’t get much lower than […]

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