November 5, 2012
Fun With THE Internet
By: K. Allen
As some of you may or may not know, “Mr. Blog” has been having trouble with a malcontent by the name of Allen Keyes. It seems that Mr. Keyes is following the hockey players lead and agitating for a bigger cut of the Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride revenue stream, and “Mr. Blog” is following the hockey owners lead by locking the dirty bum out. So in an effort to force Keyes to come to the table, “Mr. Blog” has hired me to show just how easily replaceable Keyes really is. For my part, I seriously doubt that “Mr. Blog” has any revenue stream. I have read his blog and frankly I wonder how it has survived this long.
So this week, in an effort to show Allen Keyes how it is done, and to simultaneously bring some measure of respectability to Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride, I present to you:
FUN WITH TEH INTERNETS THE INTERNET. – I don’t know where Keyes went to school, but it’s not TEH, it’s THE. And internets? What’s with the plural? There’s only ONE internet. Fun with THE INTERNET. I’ve been wanting to correct that for years.
Anyway, so what does this Keyes guy do around here besides make the maintenance staff feel uncomfortable? (You would not believe the stories Lupe has shared with me. She has not yet stopped crying – Mr. BTR.) Oh yes, he makes funny captions for random pictures with his “internets” witticisms. Ok, I can do that:
TODAY’S SEARCH: BLUE SHIRT 
Oooh, look at him! He’s blue shirt wearing guy. I bet he looked really hard just to find a shade of blue that nice! LOL (laugh out loud). And it even matches his eyes! HILARIOUS! I suspect he is a banker.
HAHA! (Laughing) This gentleman is wearing a tie! I totally like that tie with that shirt! 🙂 (SMILEY FACE) I wonder where he purchased that tie! *SNORT* (Snort)
“Tee hee! I bet this guy’s employers respect him! NSFW (Not Safe for Work). I bet his girlfriend enjoys that he’s well dressed! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA LOLZQTFW (????)”
See how easy that is? Oh, hey I almost forgot, no Allen Keyes column would be complete without the cheap and easy laugh of a bad fat guy Photoshop:
Look! It’s hilarious! The Fat Guy is chowing down on a hammer! WOW! GET IT? See, he’ll eat anything! And see how crudely done the Photoshop is? A trained monkey or a talented 5-year old could do this!
Let’s see, have I hit all the various Allan Keyes standbys? Burt Reynolds, Wrestling, Mr. T, Nursing Home Fire, Laser Death Car, Video Games, Cosplay, Fantasy Baseball. I think that should just about cover it.
Now here, let’s finish it up by avoiding having an abrupt awkward ending to this post by throwing in some random unrelated internet pictures and a relevant Simpson’s reference!
Mr. Blog's Tepid Ride 
Put them all together, they spell….. ?
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