Tag Archives: Sweden

Imponderable #41: Katrineholm Sweden

23 Mar

March 23, 2012

Didn’t I see this on HBO? They really should consider making this into a series. Think True Blood meets Oz.

This is the Odd Couple for the modern audience. He is a cannibal. She is a vampire. Can they live together without killing each other? I mean that literally. He killed and ate his girlfriend; she killed and drank a man’s blood. I think one of them will not survive the honeymoon. J-Date really nailed this match. 

It is obvious that these two crazy kids have no future together. Because one is going to devour the other.

If the article is correct, they are locked in the same psychiatric institution. If this were a Hammer film Peter Cushing would be conducting strange experiments in the back room.

What kind of child would a cannibal and a vampire have?

The question is Imponderable.

But the kid would look something like this:

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Beans, Beans The Musical Fruit, The More You Eat, The More You Play Disco Music

12 Jan

January 12, 2011

Of the many things I never expected to read, this was not one of them.

You’ve heard of eine kleine nachtmusik? Here’s eine kleine stomachmusik
 

Meet Fredrik Hjelmqvist.

There’s little I can add to the jokes you must already have come up with.    

 
 

And now for a little stomache music...

 This man gives a new meaning to term “illegal downloads.”

Just imagine a romantic evening. A wonderful dinner, a carriage ride around Central Park, and music emanating from a man’s abdomen. What woman could resist? Sorry. I meant to say, what woman would go near him again?

Beans have long been known as the musical fruit, but swallowing this bean brings it to an entirely new level. Sure, most men have been known to toot a little from time to time, but how many of us have played three-part harmony? Alone, that is.
 
Just think. You find yourself pursued by the police- pop in a capsule of high-speed chase music. In a dark alley? Swallow a pill of ominous bass music. Having sex? Pop a capsule of 70’s porno music. And a Viagra. You can be your own soundtrack!
 
Record someone else’s voice and fool any voice recognition software. Just be sure to have an answer as to why you are holding the phone to your stomach.
 
Of course, an invention like this must have many serious practical applications, one would expect, though they escape me at the moment. Perhaps you can rent him out for parties…?
  

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