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Spotlight: Spot of Bother by Jeff Lynch

23 Nov

November 23, 2011

Jeff lives in Asheville, NC with his partner Eric and their two dogs Dixie and Shade.

Small business owner and avid fan of all things bizarre.

Formerly of the Bothersome Things podcast, you can now find Jeff’s weekly Spot of Bother news commentary on the Flash Cast Podcast.

That’s the description from his website but that hardly does him justice. Over on Flash Cast he’s been called “the evil NPR guy” but that’s not quite it either. One thing is for sure, his segment is always a highlight for me. When you read the post below you’ll see why. And you’ll see why I’m jealous as well. While we share the some of the same interests, he writes about them much more eloquently than I do. And perhaps even worse, his segment usually precedes mine on the Flash Cast. While my voice work can be described as (and I am being generous) competent, Jeff sounds like a pro. He is a tough act to follow. In fact, given his deep voice and subject matter, maybe “Evil NPR Guy” is about right.

Jeff’s Spot of Bother can be found on the web right here.
You can also find him on twitter @PleaseLynchMe

This Summer I took it upon myself to lose twenty pounds of unwanted weight, and contrary to popular recommendations I did not opt to start by removing my head. I have such kind friends. Actually I had two reasons for my endeavor, lowering my cholesterol and an upcoming trip to South Beach. In all honesty, looking better (note: I did not say good) in a bathing suite was probably the real catalyst. I can see the flab in the mirror after all, not the Wendy’s Baconators swimming around in my bloodstream looking for a soft, warm home. After toiling away at the gym all Spring and Summer, I did in fact loose the weight and rediscovered my old self.  I’m now back to my college days pant size. The problem is, those trips to the gym must now continue or else I’m sure to slip right back into my arm chair and lose myself in another episode of, say, American Chopper whilst chowing down on the aforementioned Baconators. It’s a vicious cycle and quite honestly I can sympathize with those who throw in the towel and pick up the Snuggie.

As it turns out, so many people are opting for the ‘arm-chair-and-bucket-of-chicken’ lifestyle that manufacturers have been forced to take notice and expand (pun intended) their product lines to accommodate these hearty folk.

My friend Melinda, a physical therapist, recently spent thousands of dollars on a new oversized treatment table because so many of her patients were no longer able to fit on the old ones designed for Americans 1.0. She explained to me that it was a trend in the medical field. Oversized gurneys, hospital beds, exam tables, wheelchairs, ambulances, the list goes on.

Now, it seems the auto industry has taken notice of this big new challenge and have began researching ways to improve upon both existing and future automobiles in order to make them more safe and convenient for the big-boned soccer moms to haul their brood around the neighborhood.  Here’s a delightful story from London’s Telegraph (Yeah, it’s not just an American thing) :

Typical family cars have become more than a foot wider and almost double the weight over the past 50 years as manufacturers struggle with the world’s obesity crisis.

Consequently some luxury manufacturers have begun road-testing the next generation of larger-sized vehicles.

Officials say will allow bigger people to maintain their comfort on the road.

In plans dubbed “plump my ride” – in a play of words from the television show Pimp My Ride – BMW has recruited 800 volunteers, ranging from the slim to the obese, for a study to gauge how obesity affects mobility while driving.

The unnamed volunteers were last week put through a series of tests designed in part to examine factors such as getting in and out of cars or looking over their shoulder while reversing.

“People are getting more obese and we want to find out how that limits their range of motion and how our vehicles can adapt to the changing needs of our customers,” Ralf Kaiser, a member of BMW’s ergonomics team, told the Sunday Times.

“We know that a lot of overweight and obese people have problems in daily life, and in the car this starts with getting in and getting out.

“In general, these aren’t sporty people. We already have things like the parking distance control, which shows obstacles on a screen when you are reversing.”

He added: “For someone who can find it difficult to turn 140 degrees to look behind them, they can now just look at the screen.

“The study will mean we can look at things more scientifically and build a car that at least 95 per cent of people can use.”

Mercedes has unveiled plans to strengthen grab handles above its doors, in part to help heavier passengers support themselves.

Porsche, meanwhile, is installing “electrically-powered steering columns” on top-of-the-range models that rise when the engine is switched off.

Over the past decade, Honda has widened its seats by up to 2in to accommodate larger bottoms while its new range of vehicles will also have buttons that will allow for so-called “sausage fingers”.

Other manufacturers are installing reversing aids and blind spot detectors as standard.

According to the latest figures a Ford Prefect was 4ft 9in wide with an 18in long seat cushion in 1953. This compared to a 2011 Ford Focus that was 6ft 1in wide with a 23in long seat cushion.

Government statistics show that more than 60 per cent of adults in England and a third of 10 and 11-year-olds are obese.

In August The Lancet medical journal said that by 2030 more than 11m would classed as obese, with a body mass index (BMI) above 30, compared with a healthy BMI score of between 18.5 and 25.

Obesity and chronic health conditions such as high blood pressure and diabetes cost Britain £20 billion a year in terms of lost productivity, it was claimed last month.

It was recently disclosed that over the past five years Yorkshire Ambulance Service spent nearly £10 million on specialist vehicles to transport obese patients.

Speaking earlier this month at a launch that unveiled plans to cut obesity levels by 2020, Andrew Lansley, the Health Secretary, said Britain had to become a nation of calorie counters to counter the obesity crisis.

Also, Consumer Reports has just released a new report reviewing the best cars currently on the market for plus-sized people. The complete list may be found here, but the top spot goes to the Honda Odyssey.

As for me, I’m going to continue my relentless pursuit of  skinny jeans on the treadmill for as long as my willpower persists. After all, the view out the gym window is great … there’s a Wendy’s right across the street.

Spotlight: New York Minute: A New York Legend (5)

21 Nov

November 21, 2011

Mob Week officially kicks off on Wednesday but this is part of it too. The New York Minute is just one of the contributions to the Flash Cast podcast. JRD Skinner, Jessica May, and Opoponax started the podcast (and of course the Flash Pulp audios) and graciously opened it up to a diverse group of contributors, myself included. Many of the contributors will be spotlighted here this week as well as a few folks from outside the Flash-Verse. So to give Mob Week a soft opening, here is the last of my regular features you will see for a while.

Hell Gate. Execution rocks. This is New York. And this is your New York Minute.

When you think of New York, especially this time of year, I’m sure many of you think of the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, skating at Rockefeller Center, and of course the famous Christmas tree. You know, all the Bright Lights Big City stuff.

Not me. I think you know that by now.

New York is full of cool history if you know where to look. And your atlas is a great place to start.

You do own an atlas, right?

Execution rocks is not a part of New York City. It is located in the center of Long Island Sound at the entrance to New York Harbor and is much closer to New Rochelle than NYC. It also boasts a very cool lighthouse that dates back to 1850 and was added to the National Register of Historic Places in 2007. I love lighthouses.

Let’s stop for a second and recap. 1850. Lighthouse. Execution Rocks. Want to bet it’s haunted? C’mon, how many episodes of Scooby Doo am I describing?

The legend goes that during Colonial times the British, wishing to avoid public executions that would inflame the revolutionary spirit, would carry out secret executions there. They would chain the condemned to the rocks at low tide and the rising water would eventually drown them. Some stories say that the skeletons were left chained to the rocks as a warning for future trouble makers.

According to lighthousefriends.com, The ghosts of the condemned had their revenge. A shipload of British soldiers, sent to pursue Washington on his retreat from Manhattan to White Plains, foundered at the reef. No redcoats survived.

The legend of the executions had such hold, that when light keepers were assigned to Execution Rocks, they were under a unique contract. No light keeper was to ever feel chained to the reef. Instead of stating a set length of duty, their contract read that their length of service was for as long as they were willing. If for any reason, they requested a transfer, it was instantly granted.

Of course, other sources say that the name Execution Rocks comes from a more mundane reason, that the name for this outcrop was chosen to reflect the historically dangerous shipping area created by the rocks’ exposure during low tides.

Guess which story I prefer.

Hell Gate is a narrow part of the East River near Queens and it is spanned by the Hell Gate Bridge. How cool is that? Wouldn’t you love to say you cross the Hell Gate Bridge to work every day? And what about the end of the day? “Yep, I’m crossing Hell Gate and going back to the wife.” Marriage is fun that way.

Anyway, Hell Gate comes from the Dutch word Hellegat, which could mean either “hell’s hole” or “bright gate/passage.” It is actually a fairly common name for hazzardous waterways in this part of the world.

By the late 19th century, hundreds of ships including HMS Hussar had sunk in the strait. In 1851 the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers began to clear obstacles from the strait with explosives; the process would last seventy years. On September 24, 1876, the Corps used 50,000 pounds of explosives to blast the dangerous rocks, which was followed by further blasting work. On October 10, 1885, the Corps carried out the largest explosion in this process, annihilating Flood Rock with 300,000 lbs. of explosives. The explosion sent a geyser of water 250 feet in the air; the blast was felt as far away as Princeton, New Jersey. The explosion has been described as “the largest planned explosion before testing began for the atomic bomb.”

The rocks at Hell Gate are also said to be the site of British executions, but if you believe the old legends, every place was. History is written by the victors.

This has been your New York Minute.

An audio version of this legend first appeared just last week in the amazing FlashPulp website. Check them out for awesomeness and goodies!