Mr. Blog's Tepid Ride

March 26, 2013

Thanks to Allan Keyes for tipping me off to this.
All week I’m featuring news items from around the world, culminating in an Imponderable from New Zealand this friday. We’ll be visiting Africa and Japan this week, but today we stick to the good ‘ol USA, and there is no state that says USA more than Texas.

Never mind snakes on a plane, these snakes are a-flame! (Hey, I know that stinks. Give me a break. You try doing this.)

This was not the most well thought out woman in the world. She saw a snake in her yard, so her natural reaction was to douse it gasoline and set it on fire. Makes perfect sense to me. I’m sure this woman panicked because:

A- the snake was a poisonous Black Mamba, which is indigenous to Africa and never, ever, seen in Texas
B- she thought the snake was an assassin. When asked, the snake replied “I’m a soldier, to which the woman said “You’re neither. You’re an errand boy, sent by grocery clerks, to collect a bill.”
C- the woman was just stupid

Personally, I think she overreacted. The proper thing for a Texan to do upon spotting a snake is to trample it with his herd of cattle.

Tags: Allan Keyes, bmj2k, Bowie County, Danger Guerrero, fire, KSLA, mother nature, Mr. Blog, Mr. Blog's Tepid Ride, Mr. BTR, news roundup, smake, Texas, UPROXX, Will Smith Road