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Allan Keyes Is Angry About Commercial Stupidity

18 Nov

November 18, 2013

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One of my favorite pastimes is going outside and yelling at the clouds. I mean look at them – acting all sexy and seductive, the teases! It’s enough to make me want to take a knife and slash slash slash…..but anyway, my court-appointed therapist informed me that that sort of behavior will be frowned upon by the judge. So as a sort of substitute, I watch TV and yell about the commercials instead. Here’s one that really grinds my gears:

“A HOTDOG MAKES ME LOSE CONTROL”

At first, this one really REALLY irritated me. I mean look – it assumes that a fairly attractive (in a severe way) wife is dumb enough to believe that her husband is openly flirting with the donut girl right in front of her. And that’s an annoying proposition – I HATE HATE HATE commercials that are stupid to the point of insulting. But the more I think about it, the more sense it makes. I mean look, I can’t count how many times I’ve been out with the wife getting lunch (we like to eat) and I take one look at the sandwich artist girl (or guy) making my turkey club and just blurt out “DAMN! I LIKES ME SOME ‘O DAT ASS!” right in front of her.

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I mean, yeah it takes about 20 minutes to convince her that I mean pASStrami but still, I can relate.

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There is one other thing I want to mention – get a look at that “sausage” – it’s a split hotdog. If you find that kind of crap tasty, you deserve to be cursed with a wife who’ll throw down over a donut girl.

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Mr. Blog Asks: Are they that cheap that they couldn’t afford a round patty? 

On a related note, this comes up on youtube as the “STUPIDEST COMMERCIAL EVER”

Hard to disagree really.

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