Archive | April, 2013

Imponderable #91: Zimbabwe

26 Apr

April 26, 2013

Medicine is such an inexact science. How can you truly know when someone dies? When consciousness leaves the body? When the spirit has passed to the domain of Yog-Sothoth? I dunno. Beats me. Better minds than mine have tried. For example, in The Boys From Brazil, the…

But I digress.

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I have only one explanation.

The funny (I mean funnier) thing is, this seems to happen all the time. Score on for the medical schools of the world.

The closest personal experience I have is when, at my uncle’s funeral, his mistress showed up. Not quite the same thing, but my aunt sure had choice words.

Have we learned nothing from Bride of Frankenstein? The Zimbabwe prostitute? My uncle’s funeral?

Love and death don’t mix.

They didn’t know she wasn’t dead?

The Question is Imponderable.

(And thanks this week to Jimbo!)

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Make Your Party Plans Now!

25 Apr

April 25, 2013

It is not too late to get ready to party like it was 4977 BC!

You still have a couple of days to plan your bash.

What the heck am I talking about?

THIS!

April 27, 4977 B.C.:

Universe is created, according to Johannes Kepler

On this day in 4977 B.C., the universe is created, according to German mathematician and astronomer Johannes Kepler, considered a founder of modern science. Kepler is best known for his theories explaining the motion of planets.

Take that Creationists! Take that Scientologists! Take that EVERYBODY! Boy, I bet you feel silly for celebrating Earth Day now, huh? April 27th is the day! Happy 6,990th Birthday Earth!

What? I’m sorry, what?

Oh.

As for Kepler’s calculation about the universe’s birthday, scientists in the 20th century developed the Big Bang theory, which showed that his calculations were off by about 13.7 billion years.

I take it all back.

Sorry to have bothered you.

But I bet it was still created on April 27th.

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