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The Saturday Comics: Marmaduke

21 Jan

January 21, 2012

Marmaduke needs no introduction. No, scratch that, Marmaduke doesn’t deserve one. Marmaduke ranks high in the pantheon of the Great Unfunny Comic Strips. Top of that list? The Family Circus. But while Family Circus can at least claim to be a look at the human condition through the eyes of children, Marmaduke is simply an unfunny strip about a gangly dog.

Let’s take a look at some Marmaduke “comics” and see if we can find a shred of humor in them.

Ha! HA HA HA! Because dogs eat garbage! HA HA HA!

Here’s that wacky mother again! She’s running, get it? Because dogs bark when they are hungry! HA HA HA HA HA!

Now the kids are bringing the funny! They hung a bone around Marmaduke’s neck and called it bling! Yeah! Those white kids are so ghetto! Oh yeah!

Oh, that’s cute and funny! Marmaduke sees a woman carrying little dog and he wants to be carried too BUT HE’S TOO BIG! HAHAHAHAHA!

OK, now THAT’S funny! Marmaduke is screwing the guy on the sidewalk while the perverted little kid looks on- see the nasty grin on his face? He knows the score!

See? That’s all it takes for Marmaduke to be funny: hardcore bestiality and corruption of a minor. Now if only there were more panels like this. Then maybe Marmaduke would be pulled from the paper.

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19 Responses to “The Saturday Comics: Marmaduke”

  1. Mac of BIOnighT January 21, 2012 at 1:20 am #

    O___o Oh boy, what was he thinking when he drew the last panel there? o__O 😀 😀 “He really likes you!” Awesome!!

    Here in Italy the dog was called “Sansone” and I am very happy to find out it wasn’t just my family and I who never found it funny at all …

    Like

    • bmj2k January 21, 2012 at 10:39 am #

      I thought that was fake but the more I poked around on the web the more I found it in various places, in various contexts, including a letter to a newspaper that referrenced it so I am positive it is real.

      Like

  2. Thomas Stazyk January 21, 2012 at 1:48 am #

    That was really painful.

    Like

    • bmj2k January 21, 2012 at 10:40 am #

      Not as painful as what Mr. Finster went through.

      Like

  3. Daniel January 21, 2012 at 3:18 am #

    # 5 – Oh my God….. Even Brian Griffin wouldn’t do that. Well, maybe w / a human woman. Giggity….. 😉

    Like

    • bmj2k January 21, 2012 at 10:46 am #

      I forgot that there was a Marmaduke cartoon.

      Like

      • Mac of BIOnighT January 21, 2012 at 10:00 pm #

        Well, at least the cartoon maintained the spirit of the strip: it’s just as depressing…

        Like

        • bmj2k January 21, 2012 at 10:10 pm #

          If you watch the second clip on youtube you can read my favorite comment:

          He should’ve gotter ever bigger! I’d love to have seen that!
          inflationgainer 1 year ago

          Somebody has a very low entertainment threshold.

          Like

  4. Marc Barnhill January 22, 2012 at 1:31 pm #

    Thank you so much, Mr. Blog, for this heartwarming tribute to one of my favorite comic strips. Most of my childhood is something of a mysterious blur, but how clearly I can recall smiling, chuckling, tittering, laughing — heck, even guffawing — over Marmaduke’s delightful misadventures. His awkward size and doggish exuberance (combined with the resigned affection of his long-suffering human family) brought so much joy to us all. Who can forget “the Duke” dragging his hapless walker behind him, burying inappropriate objects in the yard, becoming romantically smitten by poodles, and wanting to squeeze through tiny doors? His love of food, his tendency to nap in inconvenient places, his slobbery off-balance greetings — could anything be funnier? Well, maybe Billy’s dotted-line journeys through the neighborhood in “Family Circus,” but Marmaduke inspired generations of children to wonder, to delight, and to dream. As the big pooch himself might say, “Rrroowwmmmffff!”

    Like

    • bmj2k January 22, 2012 at 2:27 pm #

      I do seem to have lost my child-like innocence and sense of wonder.

      Like

      • Mac of BIOnighT January 22, 2012 at 3:34 pm #

        I do love a lot of embarrassing things myself, but as an adult I can tell when something is just a childhood memory I’m fond of and when it is something objectively worthy.
        I do understand and respect your reaction, love is love, but honestly: is a woman telling her dog not to rummage through garbage really funny to you? Does it make you laugh? Really? I mean, my sense of humor is certainly a bit off kilter, but frankly…

        Anyway, love is love, as I said, so obviously I respect your opinion, my apologies if mine offends or hurts you. But I never found it even mildly amusing even as a little child… to each his own, I guess.

        Like

        • Thomas Stazyk January 22, 2012 at 4:10 pm #

          As I’m reading the comments and having some faith in humanity restored, it does occur to me that there is a segment of society that probably finds this comic funny–and they are the same people who think that when their slobbering dog jumps on their guests (i.e., you) it is a sign of canine affection that everyone should find funny and heartwarming. Not!

          Like

        • Marc Barnhill January 22, 2012 at 5:00 pm #

          LOL! I’d nearly forgotten about the big guy’s penchant for trash! Hilarious stuff, and so timely. In this “modern” age of sarcasm, snark and irony, where it’s impossible to know when someone’s pulling your leg no matter how obviously they lay it on, thank the good Lord there’s still wholesome family entertainment that can give us all tremendous belly laughs — out loud, mind you — as well as brighten one’s day and make the world just a little bit more special. Thanks so much for the wonderful memories, Mac! And long live Marmaduke! (Arrrrooooo!)

          Like

          • Mac of BIOnighT January 22, 2012 at 8:12 pm #

            Don’t thank me, I’m not the owner of the blog, and I’m beginning to think you are testing some new, sophisticated way of making fun of people… you’ve probably given away a bit too much in this post 😉 If you are, then it’s pretty good 🙂

            If you’re not, however unlikely this might be, I understand what you feel, that’s more or less what I feel, too, when I stumble across some piece of my childhood (the good ones, I mean).

            Like

            • bmj2k January 23, 2012 at 6:09 am #

              “Don’t thank me, I’m not the owner of the blog…”

              Would you care to make me an offer?

              Like

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