Tag Archives: madam

Imponderable #85: Milton Keynes England

15 Mar

March 15, 2013

Let’s jump right in, shall we? (“That’s what she said!”)

     iamgoingtomugonlyoldpeople                  

Perfect! I am only going to mug old and disabled people because it would be wrong to discriminate against them. I am going to mug only the homeless (though the point of that is beyond me) and when it comes to murder I will only attack female executives being kept down by the glass ceiling. Really, it is just fair.

(BTW- “Milton Keynes” is actually the name of a town. Don’t make the mistake I did of confusing it with the name of my dentist.)

Of course, and this should come as no surprise, the Mr. Grammar in me wonders why “madams” is in quotation marks. Is she not a madam? Does the word madam stand for something else? It isn’t like they danced around the word brothel.

But to get back to my crime spree, I think it only fair (and right!)  to steal the wallets of people in wheelchairs and to only hold ethnic minorities hostage. Plus, I promise to commit all of my crimes in the most environmentally friendly way possible. For example, I will only wear ski masks made of free-range wool when I rob banks. And my getaway car will be a Prius to cut down on my criminal carbon footprint. You see, I care. I really do.

And I will never rob a middle-aged white guy because that is a sure one-way ticket to jail.

So watch out, you mentally handicapped, physically disabled, senior citizen minority with a rare blood type, I am coming for you.

Is Becky Adams a legal savant?
The Question is Imponderable… until the British courts rule on this.

That's her.

That’s her.

The other question is, well, look at her face. You can figure it out.

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