Tag Archives: Japan

Japan Baseball Isn’t That Great

17 May

May 17, 2012

Today I turn over the reins of the site to Allan Keyes, world traveler, baseball fan, and guest blogger. Take it away!

I’d like to thank everyone for the thoughtful – and sometimes funny- comments you all had about my pics of my trip to Japan. I didn’t realize Mr. B was so hard up for content! Seriously though, lest you think I actually had any photo skills, just realize that to get to the few gems presented here, he had to wade through around 800 shots, many not so good.

Japan is an amazing place, and I’d like to share some of my quick takes with you. The first and foremost thing I can tell you all with authority:  JAPANESE BASEBALL IS NOT VERY GOOD.  I spent a lot of time watching (on TV alas) while I was there. Now don’t get me wrong, Japan professional baseball has several things in its favor:

–          The fundamentals level there is higher than it is in the majors

–          They have some world-class pitching talent (on a related note, I was in Tokyo when Yu Darvish pitched against Hideki Kuroda in New York, and the country was going ape-sh*t over that matchup)

–          You never see any players dogging it

–          It’s fun to see washed-up MLB players surface in Japan. (I can report that I did a spit take when I saw Mr. Blog’s favorite player Lastings “L-Millz” Milledge show up and ground out weakly to SS)

–          The television announcers are wonderfully enthusiastic. You know in soccer, when a guy scores and the announcer yells “gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooal!!!!!” for 20 minutes? That’s the level of energy that the play-by-play guys bring to routine putouts at first.

–          The Yomiuri Giants have a cool logo:

                       

Whenever a Giants player hits a HR, he is the recipient of a stuffed doll of this mascot when he arrives at home plate. At home, if the Giants win, the MVP of the game gets hauled onto the field and he gets a doll as well. Watching grown sweaty athletes treating this doll with the reverence of his grandfather’s urn is touching and amusing at the same time.

–          The fans are really into it. During the home team’s at bats, the designated cheering section has a little band, and they play the team fight song OVER AND OVER.  I can hum the fight songs for the Giants and the Chiba Lotte Marines still.

–          For some reason, the home team is listed on top of the box score graphic, instead of at the bottom like we do here. You have no idea how much that flummoxed me until I figured it out!

–          Snazzy graphics. When a team scores, there’s a nice flashy logo showing the score change.

So with all that, why does Japanese baseball kinda blow? It’s because all of the hitters are wannabe Ichiros. I can’t blame them – the guy is a national hero and bona fide Hall of Fame player.  But there’s not a lot of enjoyment for me in watching a game where the entire battle plan seems to consist of chopping the ball over the infielder’s head, or slapping an opposite field single. Meh. There’s very little power going on out there, shockingly when you consider the legacy of Sadaharu Oh, quite possibly the 2nd greatest homerun hitter who ever lived.  It tends to make for a station-to-station game.  I’ve heard it said that Japanese professional baseball should be considered equal to AAA+ ball here, and I think that’s about right. I’ve also been reading that the league there is in financial trouble, and that makes me sad, because they have a great history, and the fans are very devoted.  Playing a team fight song every inning – even in games where the team is down 6 runs – isn’t something a casual fan does. I’ve also always had a soft spot in my heart for Japan baseball after my all-time favorite manager Bobby Valentine won the Japan Series with perennial also-rans Chiba Lotte.  It is for the sake of this man, that I hope Japan baseball flourishes:

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Grandpa, No! Classic Japan Repost

10 May

May 10, 2012

This is the last, and most disturbing, of my Japan-themed blogs. This one has gotten me a lot of hits from search engines. Frankly that scares me.

From November 17, 2010

I’ve been mining News of the Weird pretty hard lately. Why? It keeps me from writing about reality TV. Of course, “Noots” is always good for a laugh, and if I see an Asian Paul Teutul I’ll post the picture, but on the whole, I think Shakespeare said it best in Hamlet:

There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,
Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.

In other words, no matter what stupidity you see on TV, the real world can always beat it for shear ridiculousness. I wonder what The Bard would think of Jersey Shore?

So here is today’s news nugget. I warn you, this one is uncomfortable.

About 20 percent of Japan‘s adult-video market is now “elder porn” with each production featuring one or more studly seniors and Shigeo Tokuda, 76, among the most popular. He told Toronto‘s Globe and Mail in October that he still “performs” physically “without Viagra,” in at least one role a month opposite much younger women. His wife and adult daughter learned only two years ago, by accident, of his late-onset career (which began at age 60 when a filmmaker hired him for his “pervert’s face”). Tokuda figures the “elder porn” genre will grow with Japan‘s increasing senior population. [Globe and Mail, 10-3-10]

Sigh.

Take a  break, drink a glass of water, I’ll wait.

Anyway, here he is, in one of the only pictures I feel even remotely comfortable posting.

The article claims he was hired for his “pervert’s face.” In Japan that gets you a job in porn. In America that gets you on the sexual predator list.

This is just a small, albeit gross, example, of the problem with health care: there’s too much of it. It’s too good. People are healthier and living longer, and this is the result.

More uncomfortable information from wikipedia. which is nearing the five-hundredth correct entry mark:

Male actors are usually anonymous in Japanese porn but Tokuda is now featured in his own branded series of videos for Ruby with actresses of various ages. Another studio specializing in elder porn is Glory Quest which launched the “old man” series Maniac Training of Lolitas in December 2004 and when that became popular, had Tokuda star with a variety of young AV actresses in the Forbidden Elderly Care (Forbidden Nursing) series beginning in August 2006. An additional series Big Tits Loving Grandfather Erotic Mischief* for Glory Quest began in April 2008. Not all of Tokuda’s roles involve sex and he enjoys acting different roles. He has said he hopes to be able to continue working in adult videos until he is 80 (with a laugh).

*isn’t that title a bit long for this sort of thing?

If you’ve stuck around this long without clicking away to something that doesn’t make you feel skeevy, you may be wondering how his family feels about all of this.

The 5 foot 3 inch slightly paunchy former “salaryman” is married with two children and a grandson. He says his wife of 45 years suspects he plays some role in the porn industry but doesn’t ask any questions and he has kept his “star” status a secret.

How? He’s been in over 350 of those things. He must have a Clark Kent thing going on.

TOKUDA: (to himself) Oh no! It is almost time to film another porn!
(to wife) I’m going out for the paper and some milk.
                   (takes off his glasses, takes out his loincloth.)
WIFE: OK, enjoy your walk.
(pause)
WIFE: How come I never see Tokuda and Big Tits Loving Grandfather in the same place? Oh well, time to fire up the DVD player.

Japan is a country of 127,360,000people. They have a life expectancy rate of 81.25 years and about 20% of the population is over 65 years old. This was bound to happen.

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