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Imponderable #42: Chumbivilcas Peru.

30 Mar

March 30, 2012

Whoever said that violence never solves anything has never been to Peru.
 

Some facts about Peru :

In 1935, Dr. Forrestal traveled to Peru to recover the Chachapoyan fertility idol and disappeared. The following year, Indiana Jones traveled to Peru to recover the idol and determine Forrestal’s fate. After claiming the idol from the Temple of the Chachapoyan Warriors, Indy was forced to give it up to another competitor, René Belloq, and flee via amphibious plane.

What? You say that’s from Raiders of the Lost Ark? Damn skippy it is. I love that movie.

Anyway, in the real world which I sometimes visit, Peru cannot survive. Seriously, it cannot. How can a country that settles all their conflicts with brute force survive? And yes, I do mean that ironically.

Anyway, Takanguy is based on an old Incan tradition, and whatever happened to them, know what I mean? Hmm? Hmmmmm?

Is all this just an excuse for me to post Lego Indiana Jones in The Raiders Of The Lost Brick?

Of course it is.

And why would they keep up this ridiculous tradition?

The question in Imponderable.

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“Waiter, this soup has too much gentleman’s buttock, please take it back.”

29 Mar

March 29, 2012

These are real products and while I will be the first to admit there are some cultural and language differences here, I am also the first to admit that I do not care.

Yeah, I admit that I took the cheap shot right off the bat.

But think about it, how many places can you go and ask for spicy cock and not thrown out, arrested, or your own rear end violated? Yes, I know that is chicken soup and yes I know that I am being immature but so what? I still laugh at farts too.

Hey, that mix contains artificial goat! No way! Booo!

I looked up the recipe for Mannish Water.

Ingredients
For 10

  •  2 pounds goat head and belly

  •  0.25 cup Grace White Cane Vinegar
  • 4 cups water
  • 4 cloves garlic, crushed
  • 6 whole pimento berries
  • 2 pounds yellow yam, peeled, diced
  • 4 medium carrots, peeled, diced
  • 2 large cho cho, peeled, diced
  • 1 pound irish potato
  • 6 fingers green bananas
  • 1 cup flour
  • 0.25 teaspoon salt
  • 0.5 cup water
  • 1 packet Grace Cock Soup Mix
  • 1 tablespoon Grace Caribbean Traditions All Purpose Seasoning
  • 2 sprigs thyme
  • 2 stalks escallion
  • 1 whole scotch bonnet pepper
  • 1 teaspoon Grace Hello Soft Margarine
  • 0.5 teaspoon Grace Caribbean Traditions Black Pepper
  • 0.25 cup white rum, optional

Directions

  1. Cut goat head and belly in small pieces then clean in a mixture of Grace Vinegar and 4 cups water.
  2. Pour 6 cups water in a pressure cooker, add 4 cloves crushed garlic, pimento berries and goat head and belly and pressure for 20 minutes.
  3. Turn off flame and allow pressure cooker to cool.
  4. Pour mixture into a 6 quart pot, add 4 cups water to pot and allow to boil.
  5. Add diced yam, carrots, cho cho, Irish potatoes and green bananas.

  6. Stir cover and leave to cook.To Make Spinners:

  7. Combine flour, 1/4 tsp salt and 1/2 cup water in bowl and knead to make a smooth dough.
  8. Leave dough to relax for 15 minutes.

  9. Make small spinners from the dough then add to the pot, stir and cover.For Seasoning:

  10. Add Grace Cock Soup Mix, Grace Caribbean Traditions All Purpose Seasoning, thyme, crushed escallion and whole scotch bonnet pepper, Grace Hello Margarine, Grace Caribbean Traditions Black Pepper and 1 tsp salt.
  11. Stir well and leave to simmer for 15 minutes.
  12. Turn off the flame and mix in the rum.

I have to admit, it seems really tasty but I never seem to have goat head around the house. I am always running out. And frankly this sounds like a lot of work just for me. This recipe serves ten. Who knew that 1.2 ounce packet could be so complicated to make? And where am I going to get ten people who love goat belly? Or better yet, why would I?

But none of that matters because unless you already know what this is, here is the only thing that comes to mind, at least my mind:

Sorry Saddam Hussein, there is no way I am drinking your bath water. That is the real Mannish Water.

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