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Mr. Duck Steps Out

23 May

May 23, 2011

Ever come across a story that seemed too good to be true? That’s how I felt when I read this:

A woman believed that Donald Duck was wooing her via satellite television. Why not? Donald is a big star. He’s on TV all the time. Is it really inconceivable that he has been sending her hidden messages in his cartoons?

Well, one thing led to another, a ladder was brought into the equation, and the woman climbed into the satellite dish- no mean feat, those panels aren’t always the strongest- where she “consummated marriage” with Donald Duck.

I have a lot of trouble with that story, not the least of which is that Donald is in a happy relationship with his girlfriend Daisy Duck and has been since 1940. The thought of Donald cheating on Daisy is too much for me to bear. It would kill the little kid inside of me.

On the other hand, I am equally worried that some other water fowl is committing identity theft by claiming to be Donald Duck and seducing crazy women via TV and having sex with them in satellite dishes.

I had to track this journal down. And while the original article is not available online I did find corroboration.

However, I was able to learn that it was indeed Donald and the happy couple is now honeymooning in Disneyland.

And the woman’s real name? Christina Aguilera.

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