Tag Archives: Ming the Mercilless

Imponderable #71: England

30 Nov

November 30, 2012

Remember Pippa Middleton? Wasn’t she one of the Hobbits? I don’t know anymore and I didn’t care ever. Back when Prince Freddie and Princess Ungo got married, or whoever, she was there, I think. I never got caught up in the Royal Family Wedding Hysteria. In fact, and this is how my mind works, when I read the name “Pippa Middleton” this is what I thought of:

Hmm, perhaps the Imponderable should be “How does my mind work?”

We’ll save that for another time.

What a brain! From the “math is hard” school of little girl’s role models, here is some more of her advice found in online reviews of her book. These are real:

“Nowadays,” she continues, “I frequently celebrate Halloween over a supper with friends. It’s a wonderful excuse to let your imagination run riot with gory-looking food and special effects.” Among her suggestions:  “Stir witchy cauldrons of pumpkin soup; hang homemade spiders inside window nooks; string cobwebs on tables; and haunt gardens, attics, and stairways with ghosts made from sheets.”

This is a professional party planner, ladies and gentlemen. By her standards (use sheets to make a ghost) every eight-year old is a party planner too.

Seriously? Here is what I learned from her book.

1- Turkeys are big so they can feed a lot of people.
2- Boxes are good for keeping things in.
3- Halloween is a spooky time of year.

This is why she is more known for this:

than she is for this:

Just as a point of reference, here is that Peppa Pig that seems to be setting England aflame:

I still prefer Henrietta Hippo myself.

I guess the real question is why anyone would care what Pippa Middleton thinks about anything in the first place?

The question is Imponderable.
And also hypocritical given the fact that America may be the most starstruck nation in the world. But if I had to ask someone for advice about anything, I think I would probably ask Pippa Middleton before Khloe Kardashian.

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