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A Public Apology to Canada

22 Apr

April 22, 2011

The Editors and Staff of Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride wish to extend our sincere and humble apologies to the great nation of Canada.

It has been brought to our attention that a blog post earlier this week, Grocery Shopping. What a Chore, may have created a false and objectionable view of Canada. In particular, this section:

And yes, I specifically mean Americans. I’m sorry Canadians, I have nothing against you but a lot of you speak French and that just won’t do. North America is an English-speaking continent, that is if you ignore large parts of  The United States in general and about 2/3 of New York City in particular.

This was actually intended as a slam against France.

We regret any misunderstanding.

The official policy of The Tepid Ride has always been pro-Canada. In an effort to improve relations with our cold Northern brothers Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride would like to present this list of notable Canadians.

Bob and Doug McKenzie
Wayne Gretzky
Wolverine
Captain Canuck
Sir Charles Tupper, former Prime Minister (May 1896-July1896)

Canada also has a thriving entertainment industry. These are the top ten shows on  Canadian television for the 2009/2010 season:

1.Survivor: Samoa & Heroes Vs. Villains – 2,929,000 viewers
2.Grey’s Anatomy  – 2,899,000
3.Criminal Minds – 2,807,000
4.American Idol – Performance  – 2,789,000
5.American Idol – Results  – 2,686,000
6.The Amazing Race 15 & 16  – 2,529,000
7.House – 2,493,000
8.CSI: New York  – 2,349,000
9.The Mentalist  – 2,279,000
10.NCIS  – 2,201,000

Canada has also had a strong influence on popular culture and has featured prominently in many hit movies, such as South Park and Rumble in the Bronx.

It is the fervent hope of The Editor’s and Staff of Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride that, with a little understanding, the peoples of The United States and Canada can come together. In truth, both countries share many similarities, except that the dollar is worth slightly less in Canada.

We hope that this apology has begun the process of healing. In the future, we hope to incorporate more pro-Canada content in The Tepid Ride, and in the spirit of camaraderie, we won’t even mention Celine Dion, eh?

Picture Postcard: Rock Video Girls Meet The Autons

21 Apr

April 21, 2011

I didn’t take this picture, it is another one from Forgotten NY but when I saw it my blood ran cold.

Oh no, this is more than just a picture of some half-naked mannequins, this is the beginning of the end. It is the beginning of a full-scale invasion, led by a washed up rock star allied with the Nestene Consciousness.

Remember Robert Palmer? Sure, he’s a has-been now but once upon a time he was the frontman for a pretty scary group of hot rock-video robots.

Now they’re back with one thought in mind: World domination. This isn’t the first time the Nestene have tried to take over the Earth with their store-dummy Autons, but fortunately they were beaten back.

Add in Robert Palmer and some partial mannequin nudity and I am very, very afraid.

We’re doomed.

I’d love to post a link that will play here but they are really fussy about it. Sorry. After the invasion you’ll see more than you can stand.