Whatever It Was, It Almost Happened To Me

25 Jul

July 25, 2015

Before I begin this tale, I’d like to give some very brief background so that this story can make even less sense than it already does. This took place in the middle of the day, around 12:30, in a residential area with plenty of people around (there are large apartment buildings on two of the four corners) and I am not a child, I am a middle aged man.

I was crossing the street and there was one car in the intersection, waiting at the red light. As I neared the car, I noticed the guy behind the wheel slide his hand out of the window and, without looking at me, wiggle his fingers in a “come here” gesture.

I paid no attention to it as I was sure he didn’t mean me. The driver was older, 65 at least, with longish white hair and a white beard. He was wearing a blue plaid shirt. I was wearing shorts and my old Fantastic Four t-shirt. I kept crossing the street and as I drew nearly parallel to the car I heard, quite loudly, his door locks open.

This just felt weird but I still didn’t think it had anything to do with me. I glanced behind me to see who was there, worried that there was a kid behind me who was his target.

There was no one there. He meant me.

Of course I just kept walking across the street, and when I got to the corner I turned back to look at the car. The driver was still looking straight ahead, and when the light turned green he drove away.

I’m not sure how to explain this. Was he trying to pick me up? Abduct me? Or did he simply want to ask me for directions but went about it in the most sinister and easily misunderstood way possible?

I may never know, but I know one thing. If the old guy really did want to pull something hinky, he probably would have broken a hip in the process.

It could have been like this

It could have been like this

Or it could have been like this

Or it could have been like this


6 Responses to “Whatever It Was, It Almost Happened To Me”

  1. Rantsofabrooklynite July 25, 2015 at 12:28 am #

    Lmbo you could have been next big thing in lets say …… PO …….LMBO


    • bmj2k July 25, 2015 at 1:15 am #

      Hmm, I could have a new career on the horizon!


  2. domingosaurus July 25, 2015 at 10:05 pm #

    Who knows? You may have simply missed out on getting some free candy. (And who doesn’t like free candy?)


    • bmj2k July 25, 2015 at 10:37 pm #

      Lol. Well, I am a sucker for gummy bears.


      • domingosaurus July 25, 2015 at 10:39 pm #

        Gummy Bear? They’ve been in my pocket. They’re really warm and soft…

        Liked by 1 person

        • bmj2k July 26, 2015 at 1:01 am #

          This offer keeps getting better and better.


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