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Allan Keyes: A Carnival of Awfulness

1 Apr

April 1, 2013

keyes1.jpg

Ever read a story about something that’s really a tempest in a teapot, but everyone involved acted so effing stupid that you just have to shake your head? Well this is one of those stories. My friends, get yourselves a cuppa, and settle down to read this mound of stupidity (well, it’s a mound of SOMETHING, but this is a family blog after all…)

DONGLE-GATE, or……oh god, I’m so very tired of this already.

http://techcrunch.com/2013/03/21/a-dongle-joke-that-spiraled-way-out-of-control/

dongle 1

I suggest you read the whole thing, but since you’re here, I’ll give you the cliff notes version.

At something called “PyCon” (a convention for Python programmers. Py-Con, get it? How cute!) some dorks in the audience were talking amongst themselves, and making some computer terminology jokes that were quasi-sexual double entendres in a Big Bang Theory meets Beavis and Butthead moment. And this is the phrase that started the trouble: ““big” dongles and “forking someone’s repo.”  Whatever the hell that means. I assume it means something to computer programmers. Or the functional retarded.dongle 2

Anyway, sitting in front of them was some shrill thin-skinned harpy who decided this was THE WORST THING EVER IN THE WORLD EVER. Which is surprising, because usually these thin skinned harridans are women whom men wouldn’t fork with someone else’s dongle, but this one is actually kinda doable:

  dongle 3

And because in today’s world, the way to act is instead of just effing turning around and asking them to knock it off, she whirled around, snapped their pic and twittered about how hostile and awful this whole thing was. Part of her reasoning was “Women in technology need consistant [sic] messaging from birth through retirement they are welcome, competent and valued in the industry,”  — now I LOVE me some womenfolk, even when they’re doing things I don’t agree with them doing like leaving the kitchen, or wearing pants, or voting or thinking independently. But the doublestandard is kind of sad at this point. Women in the workplace demand to be seen as strong, independent and equal to any man…..unless said man makes a boobie joke, in which case they’re reduced to hysterical delicate flowers needing protection. Pick one please and stick with it. What ever happened to telling someone “hey, fuck you?” This is why a show like Mad Men is so popular nowadays. Contrast dealing with people like her at the workplace to a show where Don Draper and his colleagues basically molest the secretaries in their offices and send them out the door with a pat on the ass and a “see ya later toots”  And one last sidenote – if you’re equal to a man, you don’t need to be nurtured. I’m a supervisor (yeah,  I’m as shocked at it as you are) and I don’t have time to nurture you. Grow up please. </misogynyrant>

Anyway….for this horrific thoughtcrime, PyCon staff read her tweet and escorted the joking dweebs from the audience. You computer programmers are hardcore.  Make one lame joke and the Python gestapo hauls you away presumably to the Linux gulag (I don’t actually know what the eff Linux is, I just needed something to make a gulag joke work)

And here’s where it starts to get awful – I know, there’s depths yet to be plumbed here!

Since Harpy McThinskin tweeted about this and made it an internet thing, the vox populi started to weigh in. Predictably, the dongler (a father of three)  got fired from his company

My second comment is this, Adria has an audience and is a successful person of the media. Just check out her web page linked in her twitter account, her hard work and social activism speaks for itself. With that great power and reach comes responsibility. As a result of the picture she took I was let go from my job today. Which sucks because I have 3 kids and I really liked that job.”

A big FUCK YOU to his company, Playhaven, whatever shit that is. Profiles in courage you guys, profiles in courage.

Now, since this was not only an internet thing, but also an entry in the gender wars, the twitterverse/Facebook brigade responded by flooding the complainer with predictably awful and over the top offensive feedback that would make a David Mamet story look like a Davey and Goliath, thus making the villain of the piece a victim.

dongle 4

At this point, hacktivist group Anonymous decided to get involved, seeking to right the injustice that was perpetrated upon the dongler, threatening computer attacks against her employer:

“Adria Richards engaged in malicious conduct to destroy the another individual’s professional career due to what she perceived as an affront to her own extremist views from a comment that was not directed at her, not meant for her to hear, and certainly not for her to provide unwarranted input on. As such, she should have her professional career destroyed just like her victim in order for justice to be rendered and balance restored to the universe. The hivemind’s judgement is final and there is no appeal. No forgiveness, no forgetting remember?”

A Denial of Service attack aimed at her employer followed this.

And the final act of this sad, pathetic play: Her company predictably (and justifiably) fired HER, claiming that since she was unable to act effectively as a product evangelist for her client because of the controversy she started with her stupid, thin-skinned whining, they had to terminate her.

So that’s the story- for now at least. It’s still bubbling along in teh internets and there it can stay.

So lets keep track here:

JOBS LOST:  2

REPUTATIONS DESTROYED: 2

COMPANY REPUTATIONS RUINED: 2

MALICIOUS ELECTRONIC ATTACKS: 1 (AT LEAST)

ALL BECAUSE SOME IDIOT MADE A LAME JOKE ABOUT A FREAKING “DONGLE”.  AND I STILL DON’T KNOW WHAT THAT IS!!!  I swear, something as trivial and lame as that can cause all of this repercussion, I don’t even know how we don’t nuke each other 3 times a day because someone at the Kremlin sneezed or someone in the Pentagon used an old hashtag or something.

The guys who made the joke were dumb and guilty of minor offense at best. He didn’t deserve to get fired.

The girl is a dope who DID deserve to be fired because she can’t cope with the real world or have the guts to just ask someone to shut up.

PyCon is a bunch of effing zeros for escorting the guy out. I can’t imagine a more boring, conformist  place than that except for maybe North Korea’s main drag after sunset.

Playhaven is a bunch of gutless cretins for firing the guy because they were afraid of blowback made about a 5th grade lame joke

The public that weighs in on this stuff online is awful

The company that fired the woman is actually justified.

And I’ll never say anything bad about the fine upstanding citizens of Anonymous. Nosiree.  Salt of the earth I say! (Stop calling me a coward!)

This one was certainly NOT fun with teh internet this week….

 

 

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3 Responses to “Allan Keyes: A Carnival of Awfulness”

  1. Daniel Appleton (@WillyAdama) April 1, 2013 at 12:25 am #

    This seems like an example of why P.C. / political sensitivity is a good idea gone horribly amok. People are scared c**p – less of saying anything for fear that somebody is gonna take exception to it. I had a friend who made a whole bunch of ” gimp ” jokes. Was I offended ? Hell no. I guess the difference was, well, that we were friends.

    Like

    • allenkeyesa April 1, 2013 at 10:18 pm #

      It’s not even so much about PC as it is about how wimpy our society has become. Why this woman couldn’t have mustered up the guts to just turn around and ask them to stop was beyond me. Very few people actually do this nowadays.

      Like

  2. T E Stazyk April 2, 2013 at 4:24 am #

    This is truly a carnival of awfulness. The woman should have just ignored it–I hope she learned a lesson. The employers certainly showed total cowardice.

    I wonder what sort of legal issues there are with respect to privacy. I think the dork who got fired should get a good lawyer.

    Like

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