What do people know about Kim? We know that Kim pees her pants.

16 Jun

June 16, 2010

Hey folks, seen this commercial?

I’m no rocket scientist, but I think I may have a problem here. The ad asks “what do people know about Kim?” Here’s what we learn:

  • She does her own makeup.
  • She cannot set up a music stand.
  • She always forgets where she puts her “magic wand.”

“People know a lot about me,” Kim says, “but they don’t need to know about my condition. And thanks to Depend, they don’t.”


I would add “And thanks to Depend, they don’t. Unless they watch TV.”

Does this woman think no one will see this? Do none of her friends watch television?

And how ashamed is she of her condition? Enough to not want anyone to know, but not enough to turn down the money that comes for being a spokeswoman.

OK, the woman is no rocket scientist either, but what about the people who made the ad? Is this product targeted at people dumb enough to think that starring in a major television ad ensures privacy? If we are to assume “Kim” is real, then she must be a real moron. If we assume “Kim” is not real and just an actor, then the ad agency assumes the we must be real morons.

Here’s another ad, targeted at men:

“My Dad? People know a lot about Dad” We know:

  • not to let Dad set up a tent.
  • Then again, the guy can “start a fire with a wet sponge.” (Why doesn’t the commercial show that? THAT I’d like to see.)
  • He sure knows how to break up a party with a ghost story.
  • He’s “the glue that holds us all together.”

“People know a lot of things about me, but no one needs to know about my condition. And thanks to Depend, they don’t.”

A couple of things to note:
First, Dad comes off a lot better than Kim, who seems like a complete yutz.
Second, being unable to control your bladder on a camping trip doesn’t seem like much of a problem. You’re in the woods. Pee anywhere.

These commercials are credited to JNT NY, and Depend is so proud of them that they posted them on YouTube on their two-month old  YouTube – DependVideo’s Channel.

There are no comments on that page, but it has, believe it or not, seven subscribers.


Of course, if you can’t control your bladder, I suppose you have more pressing things to worry about besides how a diaper ad insults your intelligence.

6 Responses to “What do people know about Kim? We know that Kim pees her pants.”

  1. Supermonge June 16, 2010 at 11:55 pm #

    It worries me that the “Dad” has trouble “Pitching a tent.” He may need some other medication to go along with his Depends. I’d also note the strange Kryptonite Green Glow of the Depends bag in both commercials…Scary!


    • bmj2k June 17, 2010 at 12:18 am #

      I’m not so sure “Dad” should be alone with the “kids” to begin with.


  2. TexasTrailerParkTrash June 17, 2010 at 11:18 am #

    If Dad’s Depends work so well, why is the sponge wet, hmmm? And, I’ll bet it was more than a “ghost story” that broke up the party (maybe that’s how the sponge got wet.) As for that glue that’s holding them all together, better take a second look there, guys. It could be time for dear old Dad to change his underwear. Just sayin’…


    • bmj2k June 17, 2010 at 5:54 pm #

      Hmm. In some circumstances, I suppose a Depends diaper could be considered a wet sponge. Perhaps there is a whole new market about to open up, campers.


  3. Thomas Stazyk June 18, 2010 at 6:31 pm #

    I can’t top the observations of Supermonge and TTPT! I too am deeply curious about the wet sponge. Plus I wonder about Kim’s “magic wand.” Maybe THAT’S her secret.


    • bmj2k June 18, 2010 at 8:38 pm #

      In a rare instance of self-restraint, I cut out a whole section where I speculated on her “magic wand.” It ruined the flow, so to speak, of the piece.

      BTW- I know Supermonge personally and he self-publishes a great little comic. Everyone should check out his site.


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