Tag Archives: pizza

Sneak Peek! September 27th, 2015

27 Sep

September 27, 2015

mystery box

What’s coming up on Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride! It’s a mystery! It can be anything!

But it isn’t a boat.

There’s a new Saturday Comics, featuring a great comic you should be reading right now. (Well, not right now, first read a couple of the posts here, then go out and read it.)

I’ll tell you a story in which I act a little out of character and frankly, I was kind of a jerk. It also involves pizza so you know you’ll like it, and it’ll have a snide aside (to be known from here on as an “asnide”) about New York’s truly crappy Mayor de Blassio #onetermmayor.

There is also a sparkling new New York Minute on the horizon, and another installment of Misfortune Cookies.

Who? What? When? Where? Why? How? What am I, Kreskin? Surf over and find out!

Always Read The Directions

17 Dec

 

December 17, 2014

I went over to my friend’s house for dinner the other day. There were four of us and we were looking forward to the meal. You see, my friend is a little bit of a foodie.

So we sat down at the dinner table and on each of our plates was a slice of frozen pizza. We each took a quick glance at each other, but hey, this must be some nouveau-food thing. As I poured myself a glass of grape soda, our host sat down and said “dig in.”

Feeling a little weird, I took a bite of the frozen slab, or I tried to. It was a block of ice. I ground down and my teeth sheared off little plasticy flecks of frozen processed cheese which fell on my shirt. But a little more pressure and snap! The frozen pizza cracked into five or six chunks of ice. One of them lodged in my windpipe and I died.

I should have paid attention to the warning on the box.

ellioscook

ellios