Tag Archives: breakfast

Breakfast with Bob and Betty

5 Feb

February 5, 2010

Need some help here folks.
Back in the early to mid-eighties, there was a morning radio show called Breakfast with Bob and Betty. It aired in NYC on, I think, the old WMCA. (That was long after it left the “Good Guys” music format behind, but long before the current “God Guys” Christian talk format.

It was a really strange show. I was young and I used to listen to it as I got ready for school. I’m not sure what this says about me. Every other kid was listening to Z100 (their motto: “You can never get too much A Flock of Seagulls”) pop hits, and I was listening to old folks talk about used razor blades.

So what was the show about? It was an attempt to recreate an old-style radio show from the 40’s or 50’s. Bob and Betty were a real-life senior citizen married couple who “invited” listeners into their “kitchen” where they served coffee (coffee was a major sponsor) and discussed the day’s events. “Neighbors” would “drop by” to give traffic and weather updates. Strangely, they would drop by regularly every twenty minutes or so. Bob and Betty should have gotten a better lock.

Bob and Betty would read the paper and discuss news events, and they would sometimes, somehow, include the listeners in their conversation.

BOB: I see that the President is at it again.
BETTY: Oh dear. And what do our listeners think?
BOB: They’re shaking their heads in amazement.
BETTY: Would they like more Maxwell House Dark Blend Coffee, from the container with the Stay-Fresh seal?
BOB: Of course!
BETTY: Yummm!

They were also folksy and talked about such things as when to replace your razor-blades. Bob, a few days later, claimed that the listeners didn’t stop calling about that topic. It really caused a stir. (It seems that Bob changed blades every month, while his listeners were aghast- they got three months out of a blade. I think they were just too cheap to buy a new blade.) They talked about cleaning your drapes, washing the dog, all the sorts of things you’d expect a happily married 1950’s-style radio couple to talk about on the radio.

But they weren’t happily married. It was clear that they were having real-life marriage problems and they often seeped into the show. Some days the banter between the two of them would be icy. The coolness between them was thick and palpable. Some days they wouldn’t talk to each other at all, and the newsreader would be stuck in the middle.

BOB: I see that the President is at it again.
NEWSMAN: Well, he is proposing some new initiatives that-
BETTY: Perhaps our listeners would like more Maxwell House Dark Blend Coffee, from the container with the Stay-Fresh seal?
NEWSMAN: Sure, um, more coffee would be great.
BOB: What were you saying about the President’s new initiatives?
NEWSMAN: Uh, he feels that-
BETTY: I think our sponsor is more important than the President, don’t you?
BOB: I’m stepping out on the porch for a smoke.

On other days, you’d get only one of them, and you were never sure if it would be Breakfast with Bob or Betty. On those days the newsreader would sit in all day and banter. Invariably, the remaining host would take thinly-veiled shots at the absent host.

Soon enough both Bob and Betty were fired and the newsman became the host of a new morning news program.

That’s really all I remember. Did any of you listen to the show? Can any of you give me any more information? I really want to know.

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Breakfast- The Most Important Meal of the Day

11 Nov

from June 30, 2007

The Editors and Staff of Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride wold like to Congratulate BMJ2K – Winner of the 2007 NAACP Image Award on his Outstanding Achievement.

NOTE: The following originally appeared in Woman’s Day Magazine, February 2006, under the pseudonym “Breakfast Betty”

Breakfast has long been known as “the most important meal of the day.” Indeed, though there has been fierce competition from both brunch and dinner, it has always been the morning meal which gives us the strength to make it through our rough days.

Back in the badly misnamed “dawn of time” (misnamed because time actually began about six months earlier) the early hominids that would later evolve to become both the human race and the French (“la culture de la sauce crémeuse“) lived in a state of near-perpetual hunger. During the day fierce predators roamed, and at night the scavengers came out. Early man would hunt in the twilight and try to find whatever sustenance they could. It wasn’t until the discovery of fire led to the innovation of bacon and eggs did humanity’s ancestors feel secure and able to meet the daylight hours. Hash browns soon followed, then coffee, then the pyramids, and then, ultimately, The Federalist Papers.

In today’s modern age, it seems silly to look back just a few decades and realize that our great-grandparents never had the opportunity to eat an Egg McMuffin. Nor did they drink Sunny Delight or Hi-C. (Both of which, by the way, contain no more than 10% juice.)

The Egg McMuffin was created by a McDonald’s franchisee who wanted to increase his profits. He reasoned that his restaurant was only open half the day, but if he opened during the morning hours he would increase sales in the previously closed early hours. He hit upon the McMuffin because it could be easily made on existing McDonald’s equipment. (True story- look it up.)

Today, McMuffin-penetration in our urban areas is fast-approaching 98%. There is not a man, woman, pre- or post-op transsexual, or child who does not have the opportunity for a hearty morning McMuffin.

The question is not, of course, whether or not to eat an Egg McMuffin for breakfast. The question becomes where do you eat your McMuffin? Important as breakfast is, many of us take the McMuffin for granted. Eating on the subway or in your car is not breakfast. Eating at your desk and dripping crumbs on your computer isn’t breakfast. Neither is gobbling your McMuffin while trying to sell a house. (If you are a realtor, this is also not a good way to sell a home.)

Breakfast should be the most human and humane meal of the day. Lunch is often just whenever you can squeeze it in. Dinner is a hassle to be endured with your family or a bad date.

Breakfast, however,  should be the basis of a good day.

Heed my advice: Make a good breakfast the center of your morning. Take it from Breakfast Betty- this column would not have possible without a strong morning meal of pancakes and vodka.

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