Tag Archives: bad poetry

Writer’s Block #8: Poetry Time

10 Dec

 

December 10, 2013

It is time once again to resort to  the list of oddball writer’s prompts used by “colleges and universities” around the country and the pickings are getting mighty slim. Today’s prompt: Write a haiku, limerick, or short poem that best represents you (NYU, 2009). This is bad, mighty bad. I am not a poet and I know it. The last time I posted some poetry on this blog was February of 2011. Here it is, in case you have somehow blotted it from your memory:

The Burger King wears a crown.
It is made out of paper.
His face is a waxen mask

Always smiling
“Have it your way.”
My way? But aren’t you the King?

Profound, no? Ok, no. But it has to be better than whatever I am about to come up with.

Writer’s Block #8: Write a haiku, limerick, or short poem that best represents you

Hi!
This is me.
I have a blog

Hmm. Well, while it fits the description, it frankly sucks. Let’s try that again.

There once was a man from Nantucket, whoseWHOA, whoa, give that another shot.

Rose petal
summer spray
sun

Better, more poetic, but it doesn’t represent me at all.

Oh well, I filled a blog page, so I give up.
And that represents me best of all.

 

A Parble (+ an unwanted bonus!)

26 Feb

February 26, 2011

Sorry to do this to you.

I am torturing you on this fine Saturday with the last of my threatened serious pieces. This is not nearly as much of a downer as the last one. In fact, it is not a downer at all, unless bad, pretentious writing makes you sad.

A Parable

“Bring me my honey!” Bellowed the Lord.
“I am sorry, oh Master, but we have none,” replied the monk.
“Then bring me my jam!” Bellowed the Lord.
“I am sorry, oh Master, but we have none,” replied the monk.
“Then bring me my spring tea!” Bellowed the Lord.
“I am sorry, oh Master, but we have none.

At length the Lord asked
“Then what have we in the kingdom?”
The monk asked
“Would you have an end to war?”
“There is no war. This is a peaceful kingdom.”
“Would you have an end to suffering?”
“There is no suffering. All have plenty and none want.”
“Would you have few enemies?”
“There are no enemies, for we have kind and gentle allies.”

“It would seem then, oh Master, that we have only one pestilence in this kingdom.”
The Lord asked “Of what do you speak, old man?”
The monk paused, and replied
“Bother where there should be none.”

—————————-

BONUS BAD POETRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Burger King wears a crown.
It is made out of paper.
His face is a waxen mask

 Always smiling
“Have it your way.”
My way? But aren’t you the King?

—————————-

Go ahead and laugh. Where’s your poetry, hmm?

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