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Dear Mr.-

11 Nov

from June 25, 2007

Dear Mr.-

I know that I was never ontime for you’re class but I tried to get there except it was the trains always be late that made me not get there.

I tryed real hard and got a 65 on my final. I did alot of the homeworks and I really need to pass.

I remember when we read that “The Child Called It” book that the guy never missed school and he got beat up by his friends and his daddy. I learned about children abuse from that book.

I hope you can pass me with a 75 or 80 because my moms will be all up in my grill if I don’t  pass good all my classes this year.

THANK YOU FOR HELPING ME!

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Dear Student:

Thank you for the thoughtful letter. I have taken the time to go back to my grade book to see if I can give you the grade you requested.

ATTENDANCE

You were absent 37 times and late 17 times. This is far below the 90% expected by the school.

HOMEWORK

You only handed in 3 out of the 38 assignments I collected.

TESTS AND QUIZZES

You missed the mid-term and all but one of the quizzes. You scored 34 on test #2 and 65 on the final.

I am very sorry, but your final grade will be 50.

Good Luck Next Year

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 Dear Mr.-:

 I think that because I passed the final and I tried real hard I deserve for you to give me a 75 for the class. I think your not fair on this. You needs to know that sometimes we can’t do all the work because it is too hard and maybe other teacdhers gave us work too.

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Dear Student:

According to school policy, you must automatically fail English because of your attendance. There is nothing I could do, even if I felt that you deserve to pass, which I do not. This cannot be changed.

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Dear Ms. –

 That isn’t fair and that isn’t the grades I deserve. If it isn’t fixed I will call the head of the school system so I think this needs a change!!!!!!

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Dear Student:

Call whomever you like, I will not pass you since you did not meet the minimum grades for passing.

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Deer Ms.

You suck

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This was a real exchange, but only the first two letters were actually written. The rest was a “conversation” between a “student” and me. I get stuff like this all the time.

“Best Of”

6 Nov

This site will contain most, but not all, of the blogs that appeared on my MySpace account. In theory, this is a “best of,” but if you read my blog you know that isn’t true. This will be a collection of movie “reviews,” lies about my family history, and gross exaggerations about my life. Expect to read about visits to the laundromat, bizarre trips, and the occasional  bad advice column from someone calling himself “Mr. Know-It-All.” Don’t expect it all to make sense, but hopefully you’ll find something you like.

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