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This Is The Future, Right? (Classic Repost)

12 Sep

September 12, 2012

This has the distinction of being one of the very rare posts I’ve run a third time. Why? I like it.
At any rate, nothing much has changed since 2007 but I’ve pretty much given up my crush on Judy Jetson, she’s such a tease. Plus Sailor Moon is just so much hotter.

from May 12, 2007

This is the future, right? I mean, when we were little kids, the 21st century was it. IT. Flying cars, robots, atomic supermen, that sort of thing. Criswell said it best- “We are all interested in the future, for that is where we shall spend the rest of our lives.” And damn if he wasn’t right, ’cause I haven’t managed yet to live in the past, at least not for real.

I was reading an old Ray Bradbury story that was set in the far-off future year of 1978, and I hate to complain and pick on such a “legend,” but man, was he wrong. I’m sorry Mr. Sci-Fi Legend Guy, but I’m not living on a Mars colony. And my “atomic-powered short-wave radio” doesn’t exist. So what’s the deal?

I’m very well-read and I’ve seen tons of movies. I know what I’m talking about. I want my ray gun! I want my personal robot! I want my own jet pack, flying car, and combination space radio-slash-TV! My hat is supposed to protect me from atomic fallout and my food is supposed to be in pill form. I should commute to work by rocket and my personal computer should be about the size of my bedroom and have the computing power of thirteen abacuses.

But I know that old movies and TV shows can be somewhat unreliable when it comes to showing things as they are. You just have to be selective. For example, I don’t really take The Jetsons seriously. How can you? It is so phony. I think that show has the worst special effects I have ever seen. That car folding into a briefcase? I can see the CGI. And the actors? I don’t know who played George Jetson but he was so weird looking! He had a head that was about as big as his torso. I’ve tried reading the credits, but they don’t tell you who played any of the Jetsons. It may be for their safety- can you imagine how many stalkers Judy Jetson had? I must have written her thirty or forty letters when I was a kid and she never wrote back. I was so stupid back then- it took me until I was 23 to realize that she lives in the future! She hasn’t gotten the letters yet!

Movies do a little better job. I like Abbott and Costello Go to Mars. These two goofy delivery guys get mixed up for scientists and, somehow, end up piloting a ship to Mars, with two bumbling crooks along for the ride. Now it may sound silly, but the film has a rather complex inner-logic and the use of soft-focus cinematography is particularly effective, especially in the sublimely genius sequence when Costello is blasting people with his freeze ray. If any film could be held up as proof of the auteur theory of filmmaking, this is certainly it. Subtle in its satire and carefully nuanced in the use of pre-Marxist Soviet propaganda, my only problem is that how can these be the same guys who played janitors who met Frankenstein and Dracula in a previous film? That part I could never figure out- when did they change careers from janitors to delivery men?

At any rate, that future was clear- men would travel to Mars and meet a race of giant dogs, as well as mechanizing the Statue of Liberty so it can duck when a rocket flies too close overhead. We would all have freeze rays and we would wear spiffy space suits. I want my spiffy space suit!

So far the future is not all it was cracked up to be. I blame Congress. They keep holding up all those laws I want them to enact. Just last month I sent Congress my Bill For The Construction Of Lunar Radium Mines. And what did they do? Sent an FBI guy with a search warrant to my house. It’s like they don’t appreciate all my help.

I sent Congress my ideas for a Rocket-Man Brigade to protect us from Interstellar Plutonian Ice Hounds and all they did was pass some sort of dopey Iraq troop-funding bill.

So as I get older I’m resigning myself to the fact that maybe I won’t be getting that robot any time soon. I may not live on the moon or have a Martian space-dog as my pet, but at least I have my fifth-grade imagination. And maybe I don’t have a jet pack or own a space-yacht, but I know that I will someday. Flash Gordon said so!

Spotlight: Peter Church (2012)

2 Aug

August 2, 2012

You might remember Peter Church from his Spotlight last year. Here is what I wrote at the time:

Meet the Renaissance Man, Peter Church… Peter has spent the last six years as a repertory actor for The Classical Theatre Project (Toronto), logging thousands of performances in productions of Hamlet, Macbeth, Romeo & Juliet, Othello and A Midsummer Night’s Dream…

He also, as you are about to read, does a whole lot more. As I said last year, he’s taken something I’ve long wanted to do and actually made a go of it. I’m jealous, but on the other hand I am not nearly as talented.

He’s been busy since the last time we checked in on him. And he has not given me one reason to let go of my jealousy in the recent months. As good a person in real life as you will ever find, (although I wonder about his choice of pets), read on and see what he’s up to now. This is a man who does not let time pass him by.

And oh yeah, he’s a darn good (and smart) writer as well.

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A few years ago I became enthralled with the term Pro Bono.  More accurately, I became enthralled with its Latin origin, Pro Bono Publico, translated as “For the Public Good”. 

Andrew Knowlton / Marie Jones in “The Man who Found Out” by Algernon Blackwood

For the Public Good… I like that.  I like the idea that some things are done simply because they are extremely good for Society.  This sentiment was a large driving force behind my partners and I when we created Radio Project X (www.radioprojectX.com).  After all, no one expects to turn a profit by producing radio plays fifty years after the death of the genre!  I suppose we do get other benefits from the process… like simply getting to write and perform radio plays!  That’s pretty rare and wonderful.  We also get to laugh and work with a number of tremendously talented artists and musicians – that’s pretty rewarding and inspiring.  And I guess it can also make us feel better about being “starving artists”.  That’s to say, if I were performing every month pro bono it’d sound to my parents like I was working for free and was a sucker, but if I’m performing every month “for the Public Good”, suddenly I’m working for a cause and I’m a philanthropist. 

from “The Evolution of Money” by Neil Jones

“The Public Domain”.  That’s another concept I love.  I’ll bet we have the notion of “Pro Bono Publico” to thank for the Public Domain as well!  It’s as though we’ve collectively agreed that if a story is told and re-told enough – when it’s been handed down through generations – then it belongs to all of us; it becomes part of us.  I know the issue of copyright is a complex and controversial one, but I love the sentiment behind the Public Domain, nonetheless.

There’s a wonderful free service in Toronto called ALAS. 

This hilariously appropriate acronym stands for “Artists’ Legal Advice Services”, and they do just that: provide free legal advice to professional artists.  They, understandably, tried very hard to advise us not to do recreations of radio plays or even short-story adaptations.  They dutifully explained that even though many of the old BROADCASTS are in the Public Domain, it doesn’t necessarily mean that the SCRIPTS are in the Public Domain.  To be certain of avoiding any “Imperial Entanglements” they suggested that I’d need to hunt down the writer of each script (or surviving family members) and confirm that they did not, in fact, happen to copyright the particular manuscript in question.  Sadly, the stinging reality around Old-Time-Radio is that many of the directors, writers and actors have had their names lost to Time.  Full series like “The Haunting Hour” (http://relicradio.com/otr/series/haunting-hour/) remain entirely un-credited.  Alas, ALAS maintained that the legal burden would be on us to uncover these missing identities in order to confirm that recreating their work would not be an infringement of copyright.

I told them that would be an impossible task.

They agreed.  And suggested we stick exclusively to writing original material.  Q.E.D.

Peter Church / John Fleming / Andrew Knowlton / Claire Armstrong / Scott Watkins in “Invasion of the Cheese Men!”

In a last-ditch filibuster, I ranted about OTR transcription discs, Shakespeare’s First Folio, World War Two, the history of Human Communication, the problem with modern entertainment, and of course… The Public Good.  ALAS eventually acknowledged that modern audio entertainment, like Radio Project X or our friends at www.flashpulp.com, is a vital part of keeping the old stories alive by introducing a modern audience to the tradition of “Sound Entertainment” to tune-in the power of Human Imagination.

As MP3 players become ubiquitous, people are becoming accustomed to listening to what they want, when they want.  The public’s aural horizons are broadening beyond the Top 40 and (thanks to the Internet) they’re able to try out new (or very old) listening material. It’s our hope that Radio Project X can bridge the gap between the modern podcast culture and the richness of classic radio drama.  

On our website, please keep an ear out for some of our hilarious original sketches and things like Algernon Blackwood’s chilling tale, “The Man who Found Out” or Philip K. Dick’s sci-fi story, “Beyond Lies the Wub”.

This month we not only have special musical guest, Katie MacTavish crooning for us, but we’re also very excited to have permission from the Theodore Sturgeon Literary Trust (http://www.theodoresturgeontrust.com/) to perform our adaptation of Sturgeon’s creepy story, “The Other Ceila”. We’ll also be performing some hilarious commercials and radio sketches, so if you’re near Toronto on August 14 or 21, come and experience what you can’t find anywhere else – it’s only ten bucks and besides… it’s for the Public Good!

“Good night and good luck!”

Peter Church
peter@radioprojectX.com
www.facebook.com/radioprojectX
www.twitter.com/radioprojectX

Radio Project X.  It’s Sound Entertainment.

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Hi, me again. I just want to say that all of his projects, links, etc, have nothing but good and fun, and sometimes good fun, associated with them, so click away and check them out.