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American Chopper: Senior vs. Junior: What do we think of Paul Senior?

2 Apr

April 2, 2012

American chopper is a repeat tonight (Drastic Steps, found here) and as usual, I am in repeats as well. But have no fear, American chopper is all new next week and, although there is as yet no program information, you can be sure I will be back with a new Weekly Rundown.

Meanwhile, if you missed the last episode, it was the PJD Muscle Car Special, and click here to read all about it.

The last time we saw Paul Senior (aside from every week on The Celebrity Apprentice)  he was determined to get back into his son’s lives. Unfortunately he had the worst luck. When he went to Mikey’s are gallery he was not there and when he went to Paulie’s house he was out of the state.

So in the spirit of bashing Paul Senior, I re-present one of the most commented upon American Chopper blogs. As of this moment it has 179 comments, which you can read by clicking here and scrolling to the bottom of the post. Enjoy this post and  keep those great comments coming. I’ll see you next week!

From June 13, 2011

NOTE:The Discovery Channel does not have any new episodes of American Chopper: Senior vs. Junior listed for at least the next two weeks. The Cadillac Build-Off was not listed as a season finale, and season 1 was twice as long as season 2 has been so far, so I think we can expect it back soon.

CADILLAC BUILD-OFF UPDATE:
“Congratulations Junior on winning the Viewer Poll!”
–Discovery.com

These are the stats as of 7pm Sunday:
TEAM SENIOR: 6, 198 members
TEAM JUNIOR: 92, 042 members

Those numbers only tell part of the story. The vote was reset after some fraudulent bidding was uncovered. At one point the vote was Senior 9,206 to Junior 227,091. That’s about 96% of the vote for Junior. Whatever the final tally, Senior got smoked by Paulie.

Junior’s bike is better by far, but I am sure that Senior lost a lot of votes because of his personality. So the obvious question is, what do we think of Paul Senior?

We already know the answer. Overwhelmingly, through all the comments left on this site, it is clear that no one is on his side. Generally, feelings range from sadness and pity to laughter to contempt. Senior had a hard life, no doubt.  He battled addiction to become and stay clean and has admitted he wasn’t always there for his sons. Through Mikey we know all the damage he’s done to his family. Mikey is the most hurt, or at least the one who shows it the most. However, while he may have admitted all the pain he caused in the past, Senior refuses to see the damage he is still doing now.

I assume that Senior watches his own show, but I also guess that he doesn’t see anything wrong in what he says or how he acts. That’s too bad. For all that he says he loves his kids, he spends ten times as much effort insulting them and putting them down.

It is unlikely that Senior will ever take a hard look in the mirror and see anything wrong, so in the spirit of an intervention, in the very unlikely event he will ever read or hear of this, I present comments left on the site after last week’s post, the end of the Cadillac Build-Off.

He keeps blaming everybody else for his greed.
MAN UP PAUL SR.

Sr. is an egotistical ass who has nothing good to say about Jr….always belittling him for his own gain
Get a grip and admit that you are the problem.

Sr cares more about his dead dog than his own son and the only thing Sr can build is a f—-d up relationship with his sons.

Paul Sr is such a jackass.
Sr get over it and move on.

Sr is a bitter man destined to be alone…Before he insults his son anymore he should look at his bank account and thank Jr for the designs that made him rich.

maybe it is time for him to admit he may have a problem.

All Senior did when Paul Jr., worked for him was belittle him in front of other employees and make him clean up their coffee cups.

Senior just wants to be greedy and have everyone think he is the sh#* and make all the money. He thinks he is entitled.

I think he is jealous of Jr.’s talent and creativity. I hope he gets therapy.

One day Senior will realize that he is going to die a lonely man, since none of his kids want anything to do with him, for the most part.

I feel Senior has some serious anger management issues

Sr and Jason sneaking into PJD…them cats need a reality check..someone shoulda shot some rock salt at those clowns!

He should get some professional help for his anger

He needs people who will immediately pick up his pencil when he drops it, in order to be secure in the knowledge that he’s the boss. Otherwise he lacks the confidence to be really sure that he is

PAUL SR WANTS A RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS SONS BUT REFUSES TO STOP PUTTING THEM DOWN AND GIVES PAUL JR NO CREDIT FOR THE GROWTH OF THE COMPANY

Sr. lost a lot of Votes for being such a ASSHOLE-
-Sad- When a man thinks more of a dead dog than his boys !!

I could go back a lot farther, I’ve been doing this blog for a long time. It wouldn’t change anything. I believe I have only gotten two- yes, two- posts in support of Paul Senior. and they were both written by the same person. Senior is surrounded by people who rely on him for work. They kiss his ass and tell him what he wants to hear. Even worse is the fool Jason, who says that Paul Sr. is like a father to him. The only person who gets comments as bad as Senior? Jason Pohl. Frankly, they deserve each other.

I think Rick (he’s cool) should quit and go work for JR., the other guys can ride the sinking ship to the bottom of the ocean with Senior and that goofy looking kiss hiney designer guy with the jack o lantern face and that dorky laugh can pretend to be Seniors surrogate son while his face keeps gettin loaded up with Seniors poop.

Who wants a bike designed by Jason (kiss ass) Pohl or that midget sycophant – Mike Ammirati.

Anyway don’t get me started on Jason Pohl, I cant stand him, constantly brown nosing senior and then has the nerve to bad mouth junior all the time and act like he was what made OCC today. Need to get a grip to be frank.

cheesy bikes designed by a nerd in a little room with no
talent, except to sucker on to seniors rear

Jason and that baldhead cat whatever his name is are two of the worst brown noses that I’ve ever seen

Keep up the good comments!

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My Memories of Cinderella

7 Mar

March 7, 2012

Written for Saarah.

Cinderella is the story of a young girl who was horribly treated by her ugly wicked step-sisters. Her evil step-mother made her cook and clean and do all the chores for the household while her other daughters became lazy and obnoxious. They treated Cinderella like a slave, rather than a member of the family. She scrubbed the floors. She mended the clothes. She chopped the wood. She milked the cows. She even built a new barn from scratch. And that was before breakfast. Don’t ask what she did after lunch. (Here’s a hint: it involves her step-mother’s toes.) What happened to her real mother? I don’t know. Where was her father? I can’t say, but with a crazy shrew of a wife and three disgusting daughters, how long would you stick around?

One day the King threw a fancy ball at the castle. (And seriously, isn’t every ball thrown at a castle fancy? Have you ever heard of a casual ball at a castle? I never have, but then again, what do I know?) Every young woman in the kingdom was invited because the King was that type of guy. Actually, every young woman minus one was invited. Would you be shocked to believe that it was Cinderella? Yeah, like you didn’t see that coming. Anyway, the step-mother was eager to send her three daughters to the ball because the Prince was young and handsome and single. And rich. Filthy stinking rich. Occupy Wall Street would have had a field day in this kingdom.

Anyway, in the days leading up to the ball Cinderella spent her time doing her sister’s nails and hair. She waited on them hand and foot because of course the Prince would never want a woman who ever washed a single dish in her lifetime. Cinderella did everything you could possibly imagine for them, and some things it is better off that you can’t imagine. Hey, there is a reason they were a wicked and evil family.

So party night came and the three step-sisters went to the castle and Cinderella, with a rare night off, went back to her miserable straw cot in the basement behind the compost heap below the leaky pipe next to the puddle of mud and the colony of rodents. Frankly, it was better than where she used to sleep- on a rock in the bottom of the well.

Cinderella was young and beautiful and frankly a little naïve. She desperately wanted to go the ball and wished that her fairy godmother would help her go the castle. Why she didn’t wish for a better life with a normal family and no more pig slop is beyond me. Anyway, I said she was naïve (and maybe a bit dumb) so she wished for her fairy godmother to send her to the ball and sure enough, her fairy godmother turned up.

Her rags turned into a beautiful gown. A pumpkin became a coach and some mice that lived in her bed became coachmen. Of course there was a catch; Cinderella had to be back by the stroke of midnight. What kind of fairy godmother is that? Sheesh, give the kid a break. (That may be just the Disney version of the story. In the real version I am sure there was a goat. Every fairy tale back then had a goat.)

Cinderella crashed the party and no one recognized her, not even her snooty step-sisters. You see, the step-sisters paid so little attention to Cinderella that they actually thought her name was Consuela and she came from Brazil. In true fairy tale fashion Cinderella was the belle of the ball. She stole the Prince’s heart but the Prince, who may not have been too smart himself, never got her name and before you could say “dues ex machina” it was midnight and Cinderella had to jet out of there. She broke out of his embrace, ran down the stairs, jumped into the coach, and got home just as the last chime of midnight struck.

Remember I said she wasn’t too bright? Why was she in a hurry to get home???? Seriously, the Prince fell in love with her, and this was the era of love at first sight and people got married to Princes after only knowing them for a couple of minutes all the time, so why did she leave?????? Stay with the Prince!

She went home (a stupid move, in my opinion) and as she lay in her bed of muddy mice-infested straw she had only her memories of a night at the castle to keep her warm because she didn’t have a blanket or a quilt.

On the other hand, the Prince asked everyone he knew (and the Prince was a popular guy so he knew a lot of people) but no one knew the name of the woman who ran off the night before. The Prince was intrigued. He had women throwing themselves at him all the time but being pure and virtuous he spurned them all. Never before had a woman spurned him. (Hey, this could only be a fairy tale. In real life if the Prince spurned that many women you know there’d be rumors about him.)

Luckily, the Prince had a clue: a single glass slipper. For some reason, the fairy godmother gave Cinderella a pair of glass slippers to wear. You just know they weren’t comfortable. I bet Cinderella had huge blisters on her feet the next day. Cinderella was in such a hurry to get home (again, why?????) that she ran right out of her shoe and the Prince, who had a foot fetish, picked it up and after spending a night with the shoe that I will not speculate about he went from house to house to find the woman whose foot fit it. Luckily Cinderella was a rare size and no one else in the kingdom wore a size six. (This is what you call suspension of disbelief.)

The Prince tried the shoe on every single girl he could find and even a pretty cow (he was desperate) but none fit the transparent footwear. Regardless, he had a great time. Foot fetish, remember?

The last house he tried, naturally, was Cinderella’s but she was in the field pulling a plow with her teeth so she never saw the Prince. He tried the shoe on the first step-sister but it was too hot. The second step-sister was too cold. I may be mixing this up with the Three Little Pigs. Sorry. Anyway, none of them fit the shoe even though one of them sliced off her big toe to make her left foot fit.

Finally, sad and unloved but with a really sexy shoe (foot fetish) the Prince decided to give up when, across the field, with the setting sun in his eye and a rainbow above, he saw the sight that would change his life forever. He saw a dead moose.

The moose had fallen across the road and blocked the way to the castle so the royal party had to take a detour and when he turned around he nearly knocked down Cinderella, who was trudging home with a load of chicken fat on her back.

I am sure you can guess what happened next, but if you can’t, here are the bullet points:

  • The slipper fit
  • The Prince loved her feet
  • They got married
  • Cinderella got her revenge on her wicked step-family with a complicated death trap just like the ones in the Saw movies.

I guess I should wrap up my memories of Cinderella with “and they lived happily ever after” but I won’t. If you ask me Cinderella was not worth it. I ain’t sayin’ she a gold digger but she ain’t messin’ with no broke Prince.

If you would learn anything from the tale of Cinderella, please take my advice and read these parting words, from the Brothers Grimm translation: 

18 years, 18 years
She got one of your kids got you for 18 years
I know somebody paying child support for one of his kids
His baby mamma’s car and crib is bigger than his
You will see him on TV any given Sunday
Win the Superbowl and drive off in a Hyundai
She was suppose to buy you shorty TYCO with your money
She went to the doctor got lypo with your money
She walking around looking like Michael with your money
Should of got that insured got GEICO for your money
If you ant no punk holla we want prenup
WE WANT PRENUP! Yeah
It’s something that you need to have
‘Cause when she leave yo ass she gone leave with half
18 years, 18 years
And on her 18th birthday he found out it wasn’t his

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