Archive | Blogging RSS feed for this section

The Return of I Found It on eBay!

23 Aug

August 23, 2012

I Found It on eBay was a fun feature for me to write. I wrote three posts about the strange and usually awful things people not only sold but often bought online. You can find the most recent post here, along with links to the older two.

It was fun, and I haven’t done it in a long time, so I decided it was time to dive into the deep end of the pool again, so here are some more true bargains you can bid on.

A soiled curtain for your child. Yes, of course, why wouldn’t someone buy it? It only has an unknown stain from a previous owner, I’m sure it is nothing that your child shouldn’t be exposed to. Unbelievably, it has FOUR bids. It was up to seven dollars. The shipping is seven-fifty, so this dirty piece of plastic is ours for only $14. C’mon people, buy a new curtain!

This isn’t the first horse with a broken leg I’ve found on eBay. Even better, if you go back to my old posts, you’ll find a unicorn with a broken horn, which in my book makes it a plain old horse. This particular ol’ Man ‘o War is selling for the less than princely sum of $4.99. Toss in the shipping and this can be yours for less than $15. Or, if you are like me, it will not ever be yours. Who would want this? Ok, so it comes with the leg and you can glue it back on. Is it worth it for a small horse statue? You have to buy a broken horse and glue it together to decorate your home? Have some respect for yourself, skip this auction.

Honestly, the first thing that struck me was the description. “Putz” reindeer. Why an I laughing? Google “putz” and see. Anyway, this is a wrecked paiper-mache ornament. It is far worse than the horse up above. At least that has only one broken leg. This thing looks like it came out of the wrong end of your dog. Maybe I am wrong and this is highly collectible. Maybe this is a valuable piece of papier-mache history. And maybe there is a lone nutcase out there who actually bid $5 for this disaster.

Ok what? These are just creepy. Who wants these pictures? They are just weird. Cute? Well, maybe to you but sure not to me. Adorable? I just don’t see it. At least the baby in the first picture is smiling. The second? Looks like a picture you’d see on the wall of a haunted hotel. If I knew who was buying these pictures I’d know who I was never going to strike up a conversation with.

All in all, eBay is an awesome place to shop. If you like limbless animals and kids with broken limbs, then this is the place for you.

Pool Pool! (3 in 1 Classic Omnibus Repost) + Update!

21 Aug

August 21, 2012

Anyone who blogs (you know who you are, don’t deny it) knows that there is precious little money in blogging. See those ads on the side and top of my blog? Haven’t seen a check yet. But that doesn’t mean that I don’t need to make money. Sure, people think of blogging as a glamorous and ritzy occupation but in reality we need real jobs. Now while I work at the unnamed for security reasons Company which I Am Employed by, I still need to supplement my income.

A few years back I dove into the world of toys and invented a product which I promoted heavily here on bmj2k.com. From 2008, here are three Classic Reposts. Plus, as a bonus, I’ll update you on the success of my new venture as well.

————————

Now Ready for Beta-Testing

from July 31, 2008

Hi all. I haven’t had time to blog much lately because I’ve been spending all my time in the research labs perfecting a new game I’ve developed. I hope it will become as big as Monopoly or Hungry Hungry Hippos. It is currently ready for beta-testing.

I call it POOL POOL. It is an inflatable billiards game you play in the swimming pool. I nearly have all the bugs worked out. The only flaw is that the chalk keeps clogging the pool filter but I am working on it.

The work is going smoothly. I decided to continue my efforts in the field of swimming pool games despite the mistake I made, the tragic mistake, in my understanding of the rules of water polo. I have settled most of the lawsuits, but I still have PETA and NYRA on my back.

I hope to have POOL POOL in stores in time for the big Christmas swimming pool season. It will make a great stocking stuffer.

—————————————————————

POOL POOL update!

from August 8, 2008

Work on POOL POOL is moving ahead nicely. It is projected to be the most demanded toy of the 2008 Christmas pool season!

In recent weeks I have made advances to improve the playability. In addition to solving the clogged filter issue, I am pleased to announce a celebrity endorsement which will further enhance the POOL POOL experience.

I am thrilled to announce the pending launch of:

Mr. T’s “I Pity the Fool POOL POOL”™

 New features include a set of water-proof markers. Players can write the names of “fools” on the billiard balls. The cue ball has been renamed “The Pityer” ® and is used to shoot the “fools” into the “I Pity the Fool Splash Zone”®

Mr. T’s “I Pity the Fool POOL POOL”™ can be played in any outdoor or indoor swimming pool.

Don’t have a pool? You can play Mr. T’s “I Pity the Fool POOL POOL”™ in your bathtub!

Don’t have a bathtub? Play Mr. T’s “I Pity the Fool POOL POOL”™ online on our soon-to-be launched Mr. T’s “I Pity the Fool POOL POOL ONLINE SPLASH ZONE!”©

I proudly expect further exciting news in the weeks to come!

———————————————–

NOW IN STOCK!

from November 23, 2008

NOW AVAILABLE!

MR. T’S “I PITY THE FOOL POOL POOL”

IN STORES NOW!

Yes, just in time for the big Christmas/Hanukkah pool toy rush, my new hit gift MR. T’S “I PITY THE FOOL POOL POOL”™ is now in stock at all fine toy retailers and pool supply warehouses.

FOR A LIMITED TIME ONLY, fans can get a GENUINE LIMITED EDITION SIGNED AND NUMBERED LITHOGRAPH with your purchase!

The first 950,000 sets of MR. T’S “I PITY THE FOOL POOL POOL”™ come with an exclusive lithograph of Mr. T himself knocking an opponent into the I PITY THE FOOL SPLASH ZONE with his own MR. T PITYER, sold separately. The lithograph was designed by the craftsmen at Zebenco Industries, who previously made the limited edition Ron Popeil Pocket Fisherman lithograph.

MR. T’S “I PITY THE FOOL POOL POOL”™is the ONLY swimming pool billiards game on the market. Buy yours NOW before they sell out!™

———————————————

NEW UPDATE!

August 21, 2012

I’m sorry to say that not only did Pool Pool not make me rich, I was later sued by Mr. T, who ended up owning the rights to both Pool Pool and my follow-up invention, Water Wars. My only consolation is that in 2009 I was able to get a court order to Stop Mr. T from blogging under the site name Mr. T’s T-Pid Ride.